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EPIGRAM.

TO BONAPARTE, ON THE FUNERALS OF NELSON AND

F

PITT.

[From the same, May 28.]

ROWN not at funeral honours paid
To him who oft thy fleets has beat-
For the same pomp awaits the shade
Of him, whose blunders made thee great.

THE IRISH DOCTOR.

[From the same, May 31.]

IERNE was sick-she applied for relief
To the College, far-fam'd for good breeding;
Doctor Pat swore by Jasus, to ease all her grief,
No cure was like plentiful bleeding!

RIGDUM FUNNIDOS.

LINES

ADDRESSED TO THE BISHOP OF NORWICH, ON HIS SUPPORTING THE CATHOLIC CLAIMS IN THE HOUSE OF LORDS.

[From the same.]

HUSH'D be the sullen, hoarse, fanatic roar !

Let Discord's raven voice be heard no more!

Extinguish'd be the torch of bigot rage,
Arm'd with the fury of some darker age !
Let now Britannia, from Religion's fane,
Efface of Prejudice the gloomy stain;
For Toleration, lo! with aspect bland,
Calls willing champions from her mitred band!
First in the cause the Norwich Prelate see!

No furious persecuting zealot he;

The warm emotions of his generous soul,
Of base expediency disdain control.
No fetters he to aid Religion craves;

Nor seeks to prop her throne by making slaves.

Sublime

Sublime he soars 'bove each coercive plan,
And shines at once the Christian and the man!
Hail, worthy Bishop! honour to the age!
Of halcyon days of peace the bright presage.
May fellow-dignitaries seek, like you,
To reign in meekness, and with love subdue!
June 2, 1808.

TEMPLA QUAM DILECTA!

[From the Morning Post.]

OUR Temples were formerly fine stately things,
Belov'd by the people, respected by kings;

D. Li

But we've now no such Temples remaining!-Ah! no, We've some Temples indeed-but they 're shabby and low; Fraught with airs most offensive-still teeming with vapeurs, Mere receptacles sordid of all sorts of papers;

Full of qualms, groans, and grumblings, and such sort of pother;

Whilst one dirty motion still follows another.

FROM AN AMERICAN PAPER.

THAT Britain seeks for peace, these facts disclose
She sends, as messenger of peace-a Rose!
The barque which bore that messenger of peace
Is nam'd Stat-ira; that's-let anger cease!

ST. ALBAN'S PARLIAMENT.

[From the Morning Chronicle, June 17.]

MR. EDITOR,

THE

HE rumour of a Parliament Meeting at the St. Alban's Tavern has at length reached the ears of the gentlemen belonging to the old establishment of that name in Palace Yard; and the two Saints are at variance. St. Stephen, from his higher antiquity, will, no doubt, be jealous of his young rival St. Alban's.

But,

But, Sir, we wish to know of whom, and of what, this new Parliament is composed. We have heard of Par liaments being called on great emergencies, such as the breaking out of a war, or the sudden rising of a rebellion, the threats of invasion, or the discomfiture of fleets and armies:-but for the price of a post-chaise! there is not such a precedent in all history. Barebone's Parliament was a grave and learned assembly compared to it. What! no alarms more important-nothing more pressing on the public mind-no danger from the Autocrat of Europe-nothing suspicious in India-nothing to be dreaded from America-no dissatisfaction in our islands abroad, or among our ma nufacturers at home-nothing, in a word, that can rouse the personal efforts, the cloquence, and the vigour of this new Parliament, but the price of posting? Is all our boasted spirit come to this? Is this sharing alike in our burdens, that we may keep the enemy from our shores? Is this teaching him what wonderful privations we can endure, and what acts of selfdenial we can perform? Were he less ignorant of the English character, what could he suppose but that the men of fortune and family here, so far from keeping equipages and carriages, cannot even afford the price of a post-chaise ?

Well! reformation never comes too late. They who for the last fourteen years have calmly and submissively arded and contributed to all the taxation which has doubled and tripled the necessaries of life, are at last roused; and despairing of doing any good in the old place, have assembled a Parliament of their own, to calculate the price of hay and straw, and to deliberate on oats and beans. They who have quietly heard of million upon million raised from the profits of industry; and who, while the industrious artizan, the shop-keeper, and the manufacturer, are struggling for bread for themselves and their dependents, can ex

hibit

hibit all the luxuries of an Eastern table, and all the magnificence of royal equipage-they are at last brought to feel, that among all the hardships of the nation, there is nothing so alarming, so disastrous, and so calamitous, as eighteen-pence a mile on a jaunt of pleasure! Yours, &c.

PEDESTRIAN.

NEW SOURCES OF FEMALE EMULATION.

TWEN

[From the same, June 22.]

WENTY years ago, an assemblage of two or three hundred persons was thought to be as much as the world of fashion could bear. It is true, indeed, that the population of rank and title has never yet been calculated. The Commissioners who lately furnished lists of the population of the kingdom, had no order to make distinctions, and confined themselves to men, women, and children. Still, according to general computation, three hundred was thought a large number to be raised in a night, and the ablest rivals for the honours of eclat were satisfied, if they topped the higher number.

Of late, however, it would appear, that two or three hundred are small parties, too snug, too comfortable, and too comeatable for modern emulation. We read now, with composure, of a thousand-an entertainment given to a thousand persons of the first rank, to a thousand friends; and some, who understand the recruiting-service, and possess all the influence of a general conscription, have been able to raise twelve hundred, capable of going through the exercise of a suite of rooms, and performing all the manoeuvres of a rout, with an exactness and precision, not only equal to veterans, but of which veterans can have no idea.

240 ON LORD c.'s STEALING THE DANISH SHIPS.

This increase in the armies of Ton, has necessarily directed the fair commanders to studies, with which they were not formerly very familiar, and has given employment to personages who were not till now thought requisite to provide for friendly visits. Previous to the day, or rather the night, appointed for a review of the brigades of rank and fashion, the architect is invited to a survey of the premises, and not only to examine the beams, supporters, &c. but to declare, to the best of his knowledge, what number of persons of distinction may be contained in a given space; and although he has the dimensions of an African slave-ship as a precedent, he is frequently found to hesitate for want of being able to form a proper average between the extended circumferences and the slim perpendiculars. His task, however, is executed from the best conjectures he is able to form; and having calculated the superficial contents of the rectangular suite, with the circular capabilities of the alcove and the saloon, he is enabled to inform the noble hostess, with an astonishing degree of accuracy, how many her rooms will not hold, that eau de luce and other revivals may be placed accordingly.

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ON LORD C.'S BOASTING OF HIS SUPERIOR DEXTERITY IN STEALING THE DANISH SHIPS.

[From the same, June 25.]

"T IS true, my Lord, the plunder'd Danes
Must own your skill in stealing;

If thieves are fittest for the reins,
Your claim is most prevailing.

Steal on, my Lord, and thank the fate
Your boasted thefts that hallows,
And gives to some the helm of state,

Where nature meant the gallows.

THE

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