GLOSSMORE.

Oh, this might have been expected from a man of such ambiguous political opinions!

STOUT.

Don't stop me, Sir! No man of common enlightenment would have squandered his substance in this way. Pictures and statues?-baugh!

EVELYN.

Why, you all said I could not spend my money better ! Ha! ha ha!-the absurdest mistake!-You don't fancy I'm going to prison?-Ha! ha!-Why don't you laugh, Sir John?-Ha! ha! ha!

SIR JOHN.

Sir, this horrible levity!-Take Sir Frederick's arm, my poor, injured, innocent child!-Mr. Evelyn, after this extraordinary scene, you can't be surprised that I-I-Zounds! I'm suffocating!

SMOOTH.

But, my dear John, it is for us at least to put an execution on the dinner.

STOUT (aside).

The election at Groginhole is to-morrow. This news may not arrive before the poll closes.-(Rushing to EVELYN) Sir, Popkins never bribes: but Popkins will bet you 1000/. that he don't come in for Groginhole.

GLOSSMORE.

This is infamous, Mr. Stout! Cipher is a man who scorns every subterfuge!-(Aside to EVELYN) But, for the sake of the Constitution, name your price.

EVELYN.

I know the services of Cipher-I know the profundity of Popkins; but it's too late-the borough's engaged!

EVELYN.

[They stop irresolute.

That's right-come along. But, I say, Blount-StoutGlossmore-Sir John-one word first: will you lend me [They all fall back. Ah! you fall back.-Behold a lesson for all who build

107. for my old nurse?

friendship upon their fortune, and not their virtues !-You lent me hundreds this morning to squander upon pleasure -you would refuse me 101. now to bestow upon benevolence. Go-we have done with each other-go!

[Exeunt, indignantly, all but EVELYN and SMOOTH. Re-enter GRAVES.

GRAVES.

Heyday!-what's all this?

EVELYN.

Ha ha!-the scheme prospers-the duper is duped! Come, my friends-come: when the standard of money goes down, in the great battle between man and fate-why, a bumper to the brave hearts that refuse to desert us!

[Exeunt.

END OF ACT IV.

ACT V.

SCENE I.

*****'s Club; SMOOTH, GLOSSMORE-other Members.

GLOSSMORE.

Will his horses be sold, think you?

SMOOTH.

Very possibly, Charles!—a fine stud-hum! ha!—Waiter, a glass of sherry!

GLOSSMORE.

They say he must go abroad!

SMOOTH.

Well! it's the best time of year for travelling, Charles!

GLOSSMORE.

We are all to be paid to-day: and that looks suspicious!

SMOOTH.

Very suspicious, Charles! Hum!-ah!

GLOSSMORE.

My dear fellow, you must know the rights of the matter: I wish you'd speak out. What have you really won? Is the house itself gone?

SMOOTH.

The house itself is certainly not gone, Charles, for I saw it exactly in the same place this morning at half-past ten— it has not moved an inch!

[Waiter gives a letter to GLOSSMORE. GLOSSMORE (reading).

What's this?

I'm

From Groginhole-an_express! amazed!!! (Reading) "They've actually, at the eleventh hour, started Mr. Evelyn; and nobody knows what his politics are! We shall be beat!-the Constitution is gone! -CIPHER!" Oh! this is infamous in Evelyn! Gets into Parliament just to keep himself out of the Bench.

He's capable of it!

SMOOTH.

GLOSSMORE.

Not a doubt of it, sir!-not a doubt of it!

Enter SIR JOHN and BLOUNT, talking.

SIR JOHN.

My dear boy, I'm not flint!

I am but a man! If

Georgina really loves you-and I am sure that she does-I will never think of sacrificing her happiness to ambition— she is yours; I told her so this very morning.

The old humbug!

BLOUNT (aside).

SIR JOHN.

She's the best of daughters!-the most obedient, artless creature! Oh! she's been properly brought up: a good daughter makes a good wife. Dine with me at seven, and we 'll talk of the settlements.

BLOUNT.

Yes; I don't care for fortune; but

SIR JOHN.

Her 10,000l. will be settled on herself-that of course.

And the more a man's worth, John, the worthier man he must be!

BLOUNT (aside).

[Exit.

Yes; he has no other child! She must have all his savings; I don't see what harm it could do me. Still that 10,000/-I want that 10,000l.: if she would but wun off now, one could get wid of the settlements.

Enter STOUT (wiping his forehead), and takes

SIR JOHN aside.

STOUT.

Sir John, we've been played upon! My secretary is brother to Flash's head clerk; Evelyn had not 300%. in the bank!

SIR JOHN.

Bless us and save us ! you take away my breath! But then-Deadly Smooth-the execution-the-oh, he must be done up!

STOUT.

All a

As to Smooth, he'd "do anything to oblige." trick, depend upon it! Smooth has already deceived me, for before the day's over Evelyn will be member for Groginhole. I've had an express from Popkins; he's in despair! not for himself—but for the country, Sir John-what's to become of the country?

SIR JOHN.

But what could be Evelyn's object?

STOUT.

Object? Do you look for an object in a whimsical creature like that? A man who has not even any political opinions! Object! Perhaps to break off his match with your daughter! Take care, Sir John, or the borough will be lost to your family!

SIR JOHN.

Aha! I begin to smell a rat! But it's not too late yet.

STOUT.

My interest in Popkins made me run to Lord Spendquick, the late proprietor of Groginhole. I told him that Evelyn could not pay the rest of the money; and he told me that

What?

SIR JOHN.

STOUT.

Mr. Sharp had just paid it him. There's no hope for Popkins! England will rue this day!

SIR JOHN.

Georgina shall lend him the money! I'll lend himevery man in my house shall lend him-I feel again what it is to be a father-in-law!-(Aside) But stop; I'll be cautious. Stout may be on his side-a trap-not likely; but I'll go first to Spendquick myself. Sir Frederick, excuse me you can't dine with me to-day. And, on second thoughts, I see it would be very unhandsome to desert poor Evelyn now he's down in the world. Can't think of it, my dear boy-can't think of it! Very much honoured, and happy to see you as a friend. Waiter! my carriage! Um! What, humbug Stingy Jack, will they? Ah! a good joke, indeed!

BLOUNT.

[Exit.

Mr. Stout, what have you been saying to Sir John? Something against my chawacter; I know you have; don't deny it. Sir, I shall expect satisfaction!

STOUT.

Satisfaction, Sir Frederick? as if a man of enlightenment had any satisfaction in fighting! Did not mention your name; we were talking of Evelyn. Only think!-he's no more ruined than you are.

BLOUNT.

Not wuined! Aha, now I understand!-So, so! Stay,