glorious day. Every thing in this world seems exceeding vile and little to me; I look so myself.

"Monday, April 12. This morning the Lord was pleased to lift up the light of his countenance upon me in secret prayer, and made the season very precious to my soul. I felt myself exceeding calm, and quite resigned to God respecting my future employment, when and where he pleased: my faith lifted me above the world, and removed all those mountains, that I could not look over of late: I wanted not the favor of men to lean upon; for I knew Christ's favor was infinitely better, and that it was no matter when and where, nor how Christ should send me, nor what trials he should exercise me with, if I might be prepared for his work and will. I now found sweetly revived in my mind the wonderful discovery of infinite wisdom in all the dispensations of God towards me, which I had a little before I met with my great trial at college: every thing appeared full of the wisdom of God.

"Wednesday, April 14. My soul longed for communion with Christ, and for the mortification of indwelling corruption, especially spiritual pride. O there is a sweet day coming, wherein "The weary will be at rest!" My soul has enjoyed much sweetness this day in the hopes of its speedy arrival.

"Thursday, April 15. My desires centered in God, and I found a sensible attraction of soul after him; I long for God, and a conformity to his will, in inward holiness, ten thousand times more than for any thing here below.

"Lord's day, April 18. I retired carly this morn. ing into the woods for prayer, and was enabled to plead with fervency for the advancement of Christ's

kingdom. At night, I saw myself infinitely indebted to God, and had a view of my short comings: it seemed to me, that I had done nothing for God; and that I had lived to him but a few hours of my life.

"Monday, April 19. I set apart this day for fasting and prayer to God for his grace, to prepare me for the work of the ministry, and in his own time to send me into his harvest. I felt a power of intercession for the advancement of the kingdom of my dear Lord: and withal, a sweet resignation, and even joy, in the thoughts of suffering hardships, distresses, yea, death itself, in the promotion of it. In the afternoon, "God was with me of a truth," O, it was blessed company indeed! God enabled me so to agonize in prayer, that I was quite wet with sweat, though in the shade, and the wind cool. My soul was drawn out very much for the world; I grasped for multitudes of souls. I had more enlargement for sinners than for the children of God, though I felt as if I could spend my life in cries for both. I never felt such an entire weanedness from this world, and so much resigned to God in every thing. O that I may always live to and upon my blessed God.

"Tuesday, April 20. This day I am twenty-four years of age. O how much mercy have I received the year past! How often has God 'Caused his goodness to pass before me!' And how poorly have I answered the vows I made this time twelvemonth to be wholly the Lord's; to be forever devoted to his service! The Lord help me to live more to his glory. This has been a sweet day to me-blessed be God. I think my soul was never so drawn out in intercession for others. I had a

fervent wrestle with the Lord for my enemies; and I hardly ever so longed to live to God, and to be altogether devoted to him.

"Lord's-day, April 25. This morning spent about two hours in secret, and was enabled, more than ordinarily, to agonize for immortal souls: though it was early in the morning, and the sun scarcely shined at all, yet my body was quite wet with sweat. Felt myself much pressed, frequently of late, to plead for the meekness and calmness of the Lamb of God. O, it is a sweet disposition, heartily to forgive all injuries, to wish our greatest enemies as well as we do our own souls! Blessed Jesus, may I daily be more and more conformed to thee! At night, was exceedingly melted with divine love, and had a sense of the blessedness of the upper world. Those words hung upon me with much sweetness, Psal. lxxxiv, 7, "They go from strength to strength, every one of them in Zion appeareth before God." O the near access that God sometimes gives us in our addresses to him! This may well be termed appearing before God; it is so indeed, in the true spiritual sense. have not had such power of intercession these many months, both for God's children, and for dead sinners. I longed for the coming of my dear Lord: I longed to join the angelic hosts in praises, wholly free from imperfection. O the blessed moment hastens! All I want is to be more holy, more like my dear Lord. O for sanctification! My very soul pants for the complete restoration of the blessed image of my Savior; that I may be fit for the blessed enjoyments and employments of the heavenly world.

"Wednesday, 28. I withdrew to my usual place

I

of retirement, in great peace and tranquillity, and spent above two hours in secret. I seemed to hang wholly on my dear Lord; wholly weaned from all other dependencies. I knew not what to say to my God, but only lean on his bosom as it were, and breathe out my desires after perfect conformity to him in all things. Thirsting desires, and insatiable longings, possessed my soul after perfect holiness; God was so precious to my soul that the world, with all its enjoyments, was infinitely vile; I had no more value for the favor of men than for pebbles: the Lord was my all; and he overruled all: which greatly delighted me. I think my faith and dependance on God scarce ever rose so high. I saw him such a fountain of goodness: that it seemed impossible I should distrust him again, or be any way anxious about any thing that should happen to me. In the evening, my heart seemed sweetly to melt, and was humbled for indwelling corruption, and I mourned like a dove. I felt that all my unhappiness arose from my being a sinner; for, with resignation, I could welcome all other trials; but sin hung heavy upon me: for God discovered to me the corruption of my heart; so that I went to bed with a heavy heart, because I was a sinner: though I did not in the least doubt of God's love. O that God would 'purge away all my dross, and take away my tin.'

April 30. Nothing grieves me so much, as that I cannot live constantly to God's glory. I could bear any spiritual conflicts, if I had but my heart all the while burning within me, with love to God. For when I feel this I cannot be dejected, but only rejoice in my Savior, who has delivered me from the reigning power, and will shortly deliver me from the indwelling of sin.

"June 12. Spent much time in prayer this morning, and enjoyed much sweetness, felt insatiable longings after God: I wondered how poor souls do to live, that have no God. The world, with all its enjoyments, quite vanished.

"18. Considering my great unfitness for th9 ministry; and total inability to do any thing for the glory of God that way, I set apart this day for prayer to God, and found him graciously near: once in particular, while I was pleading for more compassion for immortal souls, my heart seemed to be opened at once, and I was enabled to cry with great ardency, I was distressed to think that I should offer such dead cold services to the living God! My soul seemed to breathe after holiness, and a life of constant devotedness to God. But I am almost lost sometimes in the pursuit of this blessedness, and ready to sink, because I continually fall short. O that the Lord would help me to hold out, yet a little while, till the happy hour of deliverance comes!"

In July, he was examined by an association of ministers, respecting his piety and learning, and received from them a license to preach the Gospel of Christ. From this period we take our leave of him as a novitiate, and he now presents himself to us in the amiable and interesting character of a minister. Perhaps no man ever felt a deeper sense of the importance and awful responsibility of this office than did Brainerd: he was overwhelmed with a consideration of his own meanness and entire insufficiency, and many a time with a soul awed and almost oppressed by the greatness of his undertaking, he ascended the pulpit with trembling steps, and a palpitating heart. There was as a minister, nothing