ページの画像
PDF
ePub

their own souls, so they seem desirous, and some of them take pains, that others might be excited to do the like.

"Lord's-day, May 13. I rose very early; felt very poorly after my long journey, and after being wet and fatigued. I have scarce ever seen such a gloomy morning in my life; there appeared to be no Sabbath; the children were all at play! I a stranger in the wilderness, and knew not where to go; and all circumstances seemed to conspire to render my affairs dark and discouraging, I mourned after the presence of God, and seemed like a creature banished from his sight. Yet he was pleased to support my sinking soul, amidst all my sorrows; so that I never entertained any thought of quitting my business among the poor Indians: but was comforted to think that death would ere long set me free from these distresses. I rode about three miles to the Irish people, where I found some that appeared sober and concerned about religion. My heart then began to be a little encouraged: I preached first to the Irish and then to the Indians; in the evening, was a little comforted; my soul seemed to rest on God, and take courage. O that the Lord would be my support and comforter in an evil world!

"14. I felt myself loose from all the world; all appeared 'Vanity and vexation of spirit.' I seemed lonesome, as if I was banished from all mankind, and bereaved of all that is called pleasurable in the world; but appeared to myself so vile and unworthy it seemed fitter for me to be here than any where else.

"17. I was greatly distressed with a sense of my vileness; appearing to myself too bad to walk on God's earth. God was pleased to let me see my

inward pollution to such a degree, that I almost despaired of being made holy. In the afternoon I met with the Indians, and preached to them. My soul seemed to confide in God; and had some enlargement in prayer: vital piety and holiness appeared sweet to me, and I longed for the perfection of it.

"May 20. I preached to the poor Indians, and enjoyed some freedom in speaking. My soul longed for assistance from above, all the while; for I saw I had no strength for that work. Afterwards I preached to the Irish people; and several seemed much concerned, with whom I discoursed afterwards with freedom and power. Blessed be God for any assistance to an unworthy worm.

"27. I visited my Indians in the morning, and attending upon a funeral among them, was affected to see their heathenish practices. O that they might be turned from darkness to light! Afterwards I got a considerable number of them together, and preached to them: and observed them very attentive. I then preached to the white people, and several seemed much concerned, especially one who had been educated a Roman catholic. Blessed be the Lord for any help.”

In this situation Mr. Brainerd did not continue a month before he was summoned to Newark, to meet the presbytery, who were engaged solemnly to designate him to his office, as missionary among the Indians. The day of ordination is a memorable æra in the life of a minister; it is a period to which he usually looks forward with trembling apprehension, the approach of which leads him to the most serious self-scrutiny, as to his motives, his qualifications, his call to the work, and "The necessity that

is laid upon him;" and the review of which, after it is past, often agitates him with the mixed sensations of shame and gratitude; and every minister will sympathize with him in the following disclosure of his feelings on this occasion.

"June 11. This day the presbytery met at Newark, in order to my ordination. I was very weak and disordered in body; yet endeavored to repose my confidence in God. I preached my probation sermon, from Acts xxvi, 17, 18, being a text given me for that end. Afterwards I passed an examination before the presbytery. My mind was burdened with the greatness of that charge I was about to take upon me: so that I could not sleep this night, though very weary and in great need of

rest.

"12. I was this morning further examined res pecting my experimental acquaintance with Christianity. At ten o'clock my ordination was attended; the sermon was preached by Mr. Pemberton. At this time I was affected with a sense of the important trust committed to me; yet was composed, and solemn without distraction: and I then (as many times before) gave myself up to God, to be for him, and not for another. O that I might always be engaged in the service of God, and duly remember the solemn charge I have received, in the presence of God, angels, and men.”

[ocr errors]

Few men, perhaps, ever passed through an ordination service, with greater satisfaction to all parties, than Brainerd. Mr. Pemberton, in a letter to the honorable Society in Scotland, by whom he was employed, paid him this just and warm tribute of affection and respect..

"We can with pleasure say, that Mr. Brainerd

passed through his ordination trials to the universal approbation of the presbytery, and appeared uncommonly qualified for the work of the ministry. He seems to be armed with a great deal of selfdenial, and animated with a noble zeal to propagate the Gospel among those barbarous nations, who have long dwelt in the darkness of heathenism."

CHAP. VI.

Mr. Brainerd's return to Delaware. Extracts from his Diary. His jour nies to different places. His preaching and success, as related by himself, as far as to the close of his first journey to Susquahannah river. Another journey to New England. Its object. A second journey to Susquahannah. His return. His arrival at Crosweeksung.

IT was mentioned, in commendation of a generous female in the Gospel, by her compassionate Redeemer, "She hath done what she could." It is a commendation which few deserve; and happy is that minister who on a review of his life can say that his hours, his talents, and his whole soul, have been devoted to the service of his God. The utmost we can do is very little, and how bitter the reflection, that even that little has not been accom plished: that we have wasted that time on trifles which should have been devoted to souls, and those energies in the airy concerns of the world, which ought to have been exhausted in the pursuit of the substantial glories of Messiah's kingdom. Alas, how few imbibe the spirit of their Redeemer, who exclaimed, "My Father worketh hitherto, and I work." Yet in this, as in every thing, allowing for human infirmity, David Brainerd followed his great exemplar. The abundance of his labors, the intenseness of his application, and the constancy of

his perseverance in forwarding the great object of his mission, are truly astonishing. And what Foster says of Howard as a philanthropist,, applies with equal force to Brainerd as a missionary. And in turning to the passage (I hope the author will forgive me that it was not written on the tablet of my memory) I find that Brainerd rose to his view when he was penning his warm and divine eulogy on the character of Howard. "The energy of his determination was so great, that if, instead of being habitual, it had been shown only for a short time on particular occasions, it would have appeared a vehement impetuosity; but by being unintermitted, it had an equability of manner which scarcely appeared to exceed the tone of a calm constancy: it was so totally the reverse of any thing like turbulence or agitation. It was the calmness of an intensity, kept uniform by the nature of the human mind forbidding it to be more, and by the character of the individual forbidding it to be less." His conduct "Implied an inconceivable severity of con. viction, that he had one thing to do; and that he who would do some great thing in this short life, must apply himself to the work with such a concentration of his forces, as to idle spectators, who live only to amuse themselves, looks like insanity." Brainerd, indeed, "Displayed a memorable example of this dedication of his whole being to his office, this eternal abjuration of the quiescent feelings.

[ocr errors]

A few days after his ordination, Mr. Brainerd resolved on returning home to his Indians at the forks of Delaware, but was detained by sickness till the 19th of June. Every thing excited in his bosom pious sensations; and of this painful detention from his favorite employment he made the following sweet

t

« 前へ次へ »