Spoken in different voices.]—Why, waiter!-Coming, sir.Where is my gravy soup ?-Just took off the gridiron.-Make haste, I shall lose my place.-I hope your honour will remember the poor ostler.-Are the beef-steaks ready?—No, but your chops are. What a concourse of people are going in these coaches. All fast behind. Hip! (Imitates the sound of the guard's horn.) Then 'tis away we rattle, Jolly dogs and stylish cattle, What work for man and beast; They cry-I've lost the coach. Spoken in various voices.]-How's this?—I'm sure my name was booked.-No such thing, ma'am.-A lady and a parrot in a cage. That fare can't go inside, one parrot's enough at a time. No room for two ladies ?-None at all for females; this is a mail coach.-Set me down at the butcher's shop: I should not like to be seen getting out of a coach.-Tie a handkerchief round your neck, Billy; you'll catch cold.-Yes, good bye, grandpapa; give my love to grandmamma.-Hip! (Imitates the horn.) Then 'tis away we rattle, What merry wags and railers, And others come, no doubt; Spoken in different voices.]—Are my boxes all safe? You have put my trunk in a wrong coach.-Never fear, ma'am, we shall overtake it.-What a figure you cut in that Welch wig?— Hold your tongue, sirrah, you've woke me out of a comfortable nap. Keep the windows shut; I have got a cold and a stiff neck. My little girl isn't well.-Keep your feet in; you've got your leg between mine.-I don't mind it, if the gentleman don't. -Hip! (Imitates the horn.) Then 'tis away we rattle, MR. G. AND JERVAS. Mr. G.-Ha! Jervas, how are you my old boy? how do things go on at home? Steward.-Bad enough, your honour, the magpie's dead. Mr. G.-Poor Mag? so he is gone. How came he to die? Steward.-Overate himself, Sir. Mr. G.-Did he? a greedy dog! Why what did he get that he liked so well? Steward.-Horse-flesh, Sir; he died of eating horse-flesh. Mr. G.-How came he to get so much horse-flesh? Steward. All your father's horses, Sir. Mr. G.-What! are they dead too? Steward.-Ay, Sir, they died of over-work. Mr. G.-And why were they over-worked, pray? Steward. To carry water, Sir. Mr. G.-To carry water! And what were they carrying water for ? Steward.-Sure Sir, to put out the fire. Mr. G.-Fire! what fire? Steward.-Oh Sir, your father's house is burnt down to the ground. Mr. G.-My father's house burnt down! and how came it set on fire? Steward.-I think it must have been the torches. Mr. G.-Torches ! what torches ? Steward.-At your mother's funeral. Mr. G.-My mother dead! Steward.-Ah, poor lady! she never looked up after it. Steward.-The loss of your father. Mr. G.-My father gone too! Steward.-Yes, poor gentleman! he took to his bed as soon as he heard of it. Mr. G.-Heard of what? Steward. The bad news, Sir, and please your honour. Steward. Yes, Sir, your bank has failed, and your credit is lost, and you are not worth a shilling in the world. I made bold, Sir, to come to wait on you to tell you about it, for I thought you would like to hear the news. SOLILOQUY OF MACBETH. Is this a dagger which I see before me, The handle toward my hand? Come, let me clutch thee: I have thee not; and yet I see thee still. Art thou not, fatal vision sensible To feeling, as to sight? or art thou but A dagger of the mind; a false creation, As this which now I draw. Thou marshall'st me the way that I was going; Mine eyes are made the fools of the other senses, Thus to mine eyes.-Now o'er the one half world, Who howls his watch, thus, with his stealthy pace, I go, and it is done; the bell invites me. YORKSHIRE HUMPHREY; OR, TWO HEADS BETTER THAN ONE. As Yorkshire Humphrey, t'other day, Numps gazing stood, and wond'ring how A sharper prowling near the spot, And soon, with fish-hook fingers, turns Numps feels the twitch, and turns around, The thief, with artful leer; Says "Sir, you'll presently be robb'd, For pickpockets are near." Quoth Numps, "I don't fear London thieves Ize not a simple youth! My guinea, master's, safe enough; I've put it in my mouth!" "You'll pardon me !" the rogue replies, Then modestly retires; Numps re-assumes the gaping post, And still the works admires. The artful prowler takes his stand, When, now, an infant thief drew near, Then thus the elder thief began Observe that gaping lout! He has a guinea in his mouth, And we must get it out." "Leave that to me!" young Filcher says, "I have a scheme quite pat! Only observe how neat I'll queer The gaping country flat!" By this time Numps, who'd gaz'd his fill, When the young pilf 'rer tripping by, ; "O Lord! oh dear! my money's lost!" While halfpence, falling from his hand, The passengers now stoop to find, And Humphrey, with a friendly hand, "There are your pence," quoth Numps, "my boy, "My pence!" quoth Filch: "here are my pence; "Help, help, good folks: for God's sake help!" "He pick'd my guinea up just now, The elder thief was lurking near, Now close to Humphrew draws; And, seizing on his gullet, plucks Then roars out-" Masters, here's the coin; But, who'd have thought to see a thief, Humphrey astonish'd, thus begins- But-" Duck him! duck him!" is the cry: "Ah! now," quoth Numps, "I will believe, What often I've heard zaid; That London thieves would steal the teeth Out of a body's head!" THE INDIAN WARRIOR'S DEFENCE. FATHERS :-you call on me to defend the accusations which have been made against me;-you have charged me with murder, rebellion, and desertion; all of which charges, I can prove false. Fathers; when the great Spirit gave me life, so that I might breathe the air of America; he also gave me the soul of an Indian Warrior; and I hope that he will see I have not debased the gifts he endowed me with ;-the snow came on the woods near thirty times before our chiefs took up the toma |