Enter Pander and Sir Bilberry Diddle. Pandir. Here's a poor pfalm-singing cobler, Sir Bilberry; he has a vote for the borough, as good as the best; do not let us pars honeft Crispin.

Sir Bil. By the essence of lilies, thou’rt right, Pander ; the scum of the mobility, as well as the scum of the gentry, at this time, must be attended to; 'tis a facrifice that's due to necesity. Therefore, may I never more breathe the mellifluous air of Montpelier, if I do not descend to request his fuffrage; the controverted occasion carries with it a pardon for the humiliating and filthy condescenfion.-Master Shoemaker, your most devoted humble fervant, (bowing) I'am, swest Sir, your’s to the ground.

[Still bowing. Cris. Master Shoemaker !—do you mean to mock me? No, no; I am no shoemaker, but like some of you very fine Gentlemen at the head of affairs-a poor cobler at best.

Sir Bil. This fellow, Pander, has been commended by some blockhead like himself for his insufferable bluntness, or he would never presume to be so shocking to the feelings of delicacy.

Pan. Bear with him, Sir Bilberry; this is a time when men will say whatever comes uppermost, paying no more respect to delicacy than Æsop's cock to his diamond. If you would fucceed, Sir Bilberry, you must descend to be perfectly reconciled to their oddities.

Sir Bil. I will be reconciled-Well, honest cobler, do you love money?
Cris. Yes; but I love honesty better-

Sir Bil. Honestly faid; if you'll do me a favour, you shall have as much honesty as you please, and money into the bargain.

Crif. Who are you, and may it please you 1?

Sir Bil. I am Śir Bilberry Diddle, Knight and Baronet, of Diddle Hall, in this county, come to offer myself for your most ancient borough of Steady Town, should I be so happy as to obtain the ultimate zenith of my wish, you, Mr. Cobler, shall soonr. find an alteration in the price of good ale ; bread shall be but half

the rate it stands at now; and above all, your trade shall flourish and your taxes fall; so that the Cobler as well as the Prince shall have the glorious opportunity of faddling his fpit, every day, with a fat surloin; your right of common foon shall be restored, and without excise or the Doctor's tythe, pigs, poultry, and plumb-puddings, shall crown your cupboards all the year. Now give me your vote, friend Crispin, and as you puff your fragrant essence from your Itall in merry glee, you'll heel the shoe, and bless the hour you gave a voice for Diddle.

Cris. Oh! you fine powdered Gentlemen are fomewhat like my codlin tree last spring.

Sir Bil. How's that, Cobler ?

Crif. It then dealt a wonderful show of blossom, fo much that I concluded a rare autumn; but, alas ! I was mistaken; I had not so much as a crump. So 'tis with you who are candidates for boroughs; you promise very fair in the spring of your canvass, but in the autumn of election, when we should expect the fruit of good works of you, we too often find you worthless, base, and barren.

Sir Bil, Nay, Mr. Cobler, you are too severe in your conclusions; a man of my honour can never deceive you-can I, Pander !

Pan. Vo, Sir Bilberry-I have known Sir Bilberry from a child, and never knew a dishonourable thing by him, upon my honour, friend Crispin.

Crif. That's the last lye you told, friend Pander. Well, Sir Bilberry Diddle, Knight and Baronet, of Diddle Hall, in this county--you are come to ask a vote of a poor Cobler ?

Sir Bil. I am, friend Crispin, and you may affure yourself that there is not a man in the whole borough I refpeet so much as you, though but a poor Cobler.

Cris. Indeed that's strange-why you never saw me before.

Sir Bil. O! that don't signify; I tell you, friend Crifpint, I respect you equal to the Mayor himself.

Cris. That's kind ;-come into my stall, and fit down, and let's have a little chat together; there, that's hearty; give us your fift. [Here Diddic takes up his cioaths, gets into the Cobler's stall, and fits down.]

Sir Bil. Pihaw! how he stinks." [-Afide.

Cris. So you love me as well as the Mayor himself ?-that’s kind; and so we'll have a glass of gin together.

Sir Bil. O! no! 'pon honour.

Cris. O yes! when this is gone, there's enough at the Three Norfolk Dumplins and Horse Shoe over the way.-- Come, here's the King's health, God bless him and his numerous pofterity !-(Drinks.)--A glass of as good maxamus as ever tipp'd over an exciseman's tongue; here, take hold.

[Presents it to Diddle. Sir Bil. Dear Mr. Cobler, you must pardon me.

Crifp. No, no, you, who love me as well as the Mayor himself, must drink with me, or I shall take it unkind, and perhaps give my vote where I think I am more respected.

Sir Bil. Resistance is in vain; to get his vote I must submit, and take the poison aside)--Well friend Crispin, to fhew that I respect you, here's yours and the King's health (drinks) pihaw, pshaw, 'tis a nauseous draught. (Afade.

Cris. That's well (throws his arms round Diddle's neck) my dear friend, that loves me as well as the Mayor himself; kiss my cheek, and then I will believe you are fincere in : your friendship.

Sir Bil. There, Crispin (pshaw ! how he stinks of vile spirits and tobacco.) [Aside. Cris. Give us your fist again (holding him by the hand) my dear friend, Sir Bilberry, who loves me as well as the Mayor himself, who can descend to drink gin with, and kiss a poor cobler in his fall-1 heartily thank you, and now I'll finish my shoe.

Sir Bil. Well, honeft Crispin, you promise to vote for me?
Cris. Who told you so?

Sir Bil. O! my dear, I understand you (taking out his purse) here are corianders that will purchase hides enough to heel-piece the whole borough-here Crispin.

Cris What ! a bribe-out of my stall, or by gingo I'll stick my awl to the head in your

[Diddle leaves the stall, Crispin follows. Sir Bil. Here's a transition, Pander.

Cris. What ! Thall Crispin Heeltap, the Cobler of Steady Town, give his vote to such a thing as you ? a mean spirited rascal who can stoop to drink gin in a stall, and to kiss the liveaty cheek of a poor Cobler? No, no, to serve your purpose you would not mind stooping to kiss my ; make off while you're safe. I'll vote for none of

your Jack a Dandies, but for my old faithful malter, Sir Thomas Trueman-fo away Sir Fop, you have your aniwer.

[Exeunt Diddle and Pander. S 0 N. Ο


Ye true hearted Britons who wish to be free,
Ne'er think it a shame to take


from me;]
Who tho' but a Cobler, and little my all,
Dare fpurn at a bribe, and scout knaves from my stall. .


Would ev'ry Elector do this--I am sure,
Our trade would increase, and our land be secure;
The poor man with plenty might lup in his cot,
With joy clap his hands, and exult in his lot.
Then all take the hint, for you all may be free,
Despise every Diddle who bows to the knee;
Where so much French folly and nonfenfe abound,
Be sure that the head, and the heart, is not found.

choice be the man, who difdains all that's mean,
To wound sacred Truth, or treat Virtue obscene;
Who feels as his own his poor country's distress,
Alid dares to do more than he's known to profess..
To you: enate such only my good friends advance,

Then a tig for Mynheer, for Don Spaniard, and France,
And, again, where the enfign of Brunswick's unfurld,
It shall foon be the wonder and dread of the world.

[Exit Cobler.

T. N, An impartial correspondent observes, that in the contention between the Coinmittees of the relpective candidates for Westminster, this difference is striking–The Commit. tee at Wood's Hotel deals freely in fcurrility and general invective against the proceedings of their opponents, while the Select Committee at Ireland's, in Bow-itreet, authenticate the accusations they bring against the supporters of Lord Hood and Sir Cecil Wray, by publishing the names of the perfons, who attest the facts alledged by them.

A correspondent obferves, that it is difficult to conceive why Lord Hood and Sir Cecil Wray's friends should perfevere in denying Mr. Churchill's having left London. Does it follow, because that gentleman's health has made it necessary for him to go to Bath. that the cause he has et poufed must be defperate?

Another correspondent supposes, that Mr. Rainforth, who is the locum tenens of Mr. Churchill, during his absence from town, mutt be an Irishman, from his late advertisement, relative to the dinner of the friends of the Court Candidates at Wood's Hotel-that. place, it seems, was not large enough to accommodate the company, and for that realou a second dinner was advertised at the


fame place. Some of the Ministerial Papers have thought proper to deny the fact of Mr. White head's having been dismissed from his place as Yeoman of the king's Guard, but the fact may be ascertained by any gentleman who will take the trouble to inquire into it froin Mr. Whitehead himself, who lives in Green-street, Grosvenor-square.

Mr. Fox insisted in the House of Commons, that the five thousand who signed the Westminster Address, did not constitute a majority of the Electors. This now appears clearly to have been the case from the present itate of the poll, which shows ihat there are more than eleven thousand householders in that city. and as there is the strongest presumption that a great number of lodgers figned the Addre's, it is a fair conclution that not one third of the Electors thanked his Majelty for turning out his Ministry. This we may concludc has been the case in all the other cities and boroughs thronghout the kingdom.

Every liberal mind revolts at the wretched abuse now levelled at the most amiable of our countrywomen! the base and burring hand of Calamay, however, is raised in vain against the lovely Dizon and her fijter patriots, who at this junciure lo much resemble


those fair celtials of the Grecian bard, whose attributes of divinity never appeared so brilliant as when forining a shield for the heroic leader of an oppressid people !

The ridicule that has been so perfeélly levelled against honest fack Churchill, has evidently more levity than justice in it.-However miltaken in politics, or misguided in foute of his more recent personal attachments, he undoubtedly has many good qualities, amongst the most shining of which is to be enumerated, his extreme ingeniousness and candour.--Ile exhibited a striking testimony of this latter virtue in a fpeech which he ad ireiled to his friend Sir Cecila few hours before he fet out for Bath-taking him by the bened, “ My dear friend, says he, you had better quit the field now when you may

go off in credit to ourselves and cause-I know Westminster as well as any man in “itmand by G- I pronounce your case perfectly defperate, with respect to your pre“ fent Llection--pretend an intention for a future fcrutiny and decline. After the * pains I have already taken, I shall not stay to be a witness of your defeat and dir“ grace--so if you won't take my counsel, why give me your hand and God bless *** you.”-A friend who happened to be present, records, he believes the very words of this parting harangue with strict accuracy, but certain he is that the general sense is most faithfully represented in this account of it. It is not yet too late, Sir Cecil, to discover a small fymptom of expiring grace. Do it, for God's sake; a friend recommends it; think what will become of the credit of Churchill, your friend, and the Court your einployers, if you shall adopt no expedient for breaking the effect of a fall to injurious to ihe feelings of the one, and the interests of the other? Try for once to reflect a little.

The House of Commons has always been rigorous in its proceedings against returning officers for illegal, arbitrary, or partial conduct during Elections. On the 22d of December, 1741, Mr. John Lever, High Bailiff of Westminster was, for such practices, committed to the custody of the Serjeant at Arms.

Extrait of a letter from Bath, dated Saturday the 22d instant. “ Yesterday evening our old acquaintance Jack Chấll made his appearance in the 66 rooms here; if I may judge from his desponding countenance, he has given up all “ hopes of his friend Sir Cecil W='s success in Westminster, Poor C-l! he looks « extremely ill, principally owing, I suppose, to the violent fatigue which he has un“ dergone in canvassing. If the Bath waters do not recruit his fpirits foon, I fear he 66 will fall into a decline.”

The prints exhibited on the late change of politics, are in general scurrilous, abusive, deftitute of merit, wit, and humour, feemingly calculated to draw a gaping and idle multitude together; and indeed, were we not charitably inclined, we could almost suspect the printsellers to be in league with the handkerchief merchants of Field-lane : for the prints daily exhibited during the present contest in Westminster, we cannot help saying, are unmanly, base, and infamous. A female character of illustrious rank and beauty, to be exhibited to the vulgar in the most indecent and obscene attitudes and conversations, is a disgrace to the artist, a disgrace to his employer, but more fo to the police : at least, our City Magistrates should have taken notice of, and put a stop to 1o glaring a nuisance, tending to extinguish the remaining spark of morality of the present age; but it seems as if religion and morality underwent a change in the city as well as politics!

The Committee at Wood's, with a stroke of some humour, have perpetualized the abdication of Jack Churchill, their desponding Chairman. No sooner were they informed he was arrived in the dumps at Bath, on Thursday last, than they fent tó Parliamentstreet, with Sir Cecil Wray's compliments, and requested the use of Mr. Churchill's chariot for a few days : this being immediately complied with, Mr. Salter, the bricklayer, of St. Margaret's, whose great resemblance of his friend Churchill has occafioned


[ocr errors][merged small]

the latter so many aukward embarrassinents, was prevailed upon to mount ??;; of ruffy sables—to take " the chariot for the day”-irive through the trees this hand to the colours of Hood and Wray, and by this cleftioneering : fujimi i, petit thofe fatal consequences which the general knowledge of Churchill's re reat in d pair, must have on the prerogative caufe ! The trick succeeded admirably the first day; but on Saturday it was unfortunately discovered by a particular friend of C's, a'ruptly stopping the chariot, and begging immediately his Galenical aid for his lady then in hyiterics. There was no parrying this unpropitious fhaft, and therefore the plot could no longer be concealed; for the gentleman, not in a temper of mind to favour the imposition, wrote by that night's post to Churchill, informing him of the particulars of the deception.-What will be the event of this harmless joke, as the contrivers call it, a few posts will probably discover ;-Sim solus! is honest Jack's motto, as well as Powell's the unparalelled fire-cater, so that all things considered, the remonstrance is expected to be acrimoniously severe from the offended party!

N. B. With their most intimate friends, Mr. Salter is only known from Mr. Churchill, at the first glance, by a small wart under his left eye!

It is now said that Mr. Fox's present votes are to a man bod, and that Lord Hood and Sir Cecil Wray's are all good. There can be no doubt of the truth of this assertion; the High Bailiff's extremne partiality for the cause of Mr. Fox, and his zealous endeavours to favour his re-election, most fully explain and confirm it.

Poor Lord Hood! how often, in the course of the last twelve days has this pitiable peer lamented that departing from the honourable course of his own profession, he thould have been absurd enough to embark on the formy sea of politics !

The military exertions of Sir Cecil Wray's party do not content them, after having polled at least 500 horse-guards and foot-guards, to the tune of nine in a house !—For on Saturday last, a French deferter was daringly brought up to the Hustings to poll for the prerogative Candidates ! On an appeal to the Returning Officer (whose lack of knowledge in the French lingo was to be his excuse) he was about to be declared a Philadelphian, begotten of English parents, and therefore an eligible vote;—when the perturbed Gaul, with a sacre Dicu, declared himself a native of France, and instantly retired, giving the High Bailiff and all his hoit a tous les Diable !

A large detachment of the Swiss guards are faid to be just landed at Dover, and now on their full inarch for the Hustings at Covent Garden, in order to poll for the Court Candidates, and thus defend the franchises of British Electors from furtber invasion!

April 24.] One vote was polled for Mr. Fox at the close of this day's poll, which, by accident or design was omitted in the casting up, and therefore cannot appear in his favour till the books are opened this morning : this reduces Sir Cecil's once boasted majority of 318, to 65 only!

The Iscariot Baronet is so sensible of his impending overthrow, that he now very rarely exposes his amiable person to the indignation of the insulted Electors of Westminster; even his late triumphant partizans, who so long disgraced the Huftings with their noile and nonfonde, have at length ceased their 1. Peans, and despairing of the return of their treacherous leader, affect to console themselves with the hopes of a six months fcrutiny!

The modest, and liberal Mr. Jackson did not treat the people with any of his arisocratic convulsions during the last week. The domestic distresses of Newcastle House are faid to have required his unremitting attendance !-despair reigns through that gloomy manfion with such a train of horrors, that knives, ropes, and razors, with all other inftruments of sudden death are removed from thence by physical injunction ! ХХ.


« 前へ次へ »