. But things had no terms, wherein that language could exprefs them which made the difficulty almoft infuperable_to give my mafter any conception of what I meant. being of an excellent understanding, much improved by contemplation and converfe, he at laft arrived at a competent knowledge of what human nature in our parts of the world is capable to perform, and defired I would give him fome particular account of that nd, which we call Europe, but fcally of my own country. CHAP. V. The author, at his mafier's commands, informs him of the fate of England The caufes of war among the princes of Europe. The author begins to explain the English conflitution. TH HE reader may please to obferve, that the following extract of many converfations I had with my mafter, contains a fummary of the most material points, which were difcourfed on at feveral times for above two years; his honour often defiring fulldr fatisfaction, as I farther improved in the Houyhnhnm tongue. I laid before him, as well as I could, the whole ftate of Europe. 1 difcourfed of trade and manufactures, of arts and fciencs; and the anfwers I gave to all the questions he made, as they arofe upon feveral fubjects, were a fund of converfation not to be exhausted. But I hall here only fet down the fubftance of what paffed between us concerning my own country, reducing it into order as well as I can, without any regard to time or other circunftances, while I ftrictly adhere to truth. My only concern is, that I fhall hardly be able to do juftice to my mafter's argu ments and expreffions, which muft needs fuffer by my want of capacity, as well as by a translation into our barbarous English. In obedience therefore to his honour's commands, I related to him the revolution under the Prince of Orange; the long war with France entered into by the faid Prince, and renewed by his fucceffor the present Queen, wherein the greatest powers of Chriftendom were engaged, and which ftill continued: I computed, at his requeft, that about a million of yahoos might have been killed in the whole progrefs of it; and perhaps a hundred or more cities taken, and five times as many hips burnt or funk. He afked me, what were the ufual caufes or motives that made one country go to war with another. I anfwered they were innumerable; but I fhould only mention a few of the chief. Sometimes the ambition of princes, who never think they have land or people enough to govern. Sometimes the corruption of minifters, who engage their master in a war, in order to stifle or divert the clamour of the subjects against their evil administration. Difference in opinions hath coft mauy millions of lives: for inftance, whether flesh be bread, or bread be flesh; whether the juice of a certain berry be blood or wine* whether whittling be a vice or a virtue ; whether it be better to kiss a poft, or throw it into the fire ; what is the best colour for a coat, whether black, white, red, or grey; and whether it should be loug or short, narrow or wide, dirty or clean, with many more **. Neither are any wars fo furious and bloody, or of fo long continuance, as those occafioned by difference in opinion, especially if it be in things indifferent. ; Sometimes the quarrel between two princes is to deeide, which of them fhall difpoffefs a third of his dominions, where neither of them pretend to any right. Sometimes one prince quarrelleth with another, for fear the other thould quarrel with him. Sometimes a war is entered upon because the enemy is too ftrong; and fometimes because he is too weak. Sometimes our neighbours want the things which we have, or have the things which we want; and we both fight, till they take ours, or give us theirs. It is a very juftifiable caufe of a war, to invade a country after the people have been wafted by famine, destroyed by peftilence, or embroiled by factions among themfelves. It is juftifiable to enter into a war against our nearest ally, when one of his towns lies conve nient for us, or a territory of land, that would render our Tranfubftantiation. † Church-mufic. Kiffing a crofs. The colour and make of facred vestments, and different orders of Popish ecclefiaftics. Hawkes. X 3 dominions dominions round and compact. If a prince fends forces into a nation, where the people are poor and ignorant, be may lawfully put the half of them to death, and make flaves of the reit, in order to civilize and reduce them from their barbarous way of living. It is a very kingly, honourable, and frequent practice, when one prince defires the affistance of another to fecure him against an invafion, that the assistant, when he hath driven out the invader, fhould feize on the dominions himself, and kill, imprison, or banifh the prince he came to relieve. Alliauce by blood, or mariage, is a frequent caufe of war between princes; and the nearer the kindred is, the greater is their difpofition to quarrel: poor nations are hungry, and rich nations are proud and pride and hunger will ever be at variance. For thefe reafons, the irade of a foldier is held the most honourable of all o thers; because a soldier is a yahoo hired to kill in cold blood as many of his own fpecies, who have never of-fended him,, as poffibly he can. There is likewife a kind of beggarly princes in Europe, not able to make war by themselves, who hire out their troops to richer nations, for fo much a day to each man; of which they keep three-fourths to themselves, and it is the best part of their maintenance; fuch are those in mamy northern parts of Europe, What you have told me (faid my mafter) upon the fubject of war, does indeed difcover most admirably the effects of that reafon you pretend to: however it is hap py that the shame is greater than the danger; and that nature hath left you utterly incapable of doing much mifchief. For, your mouths lying flat with your faces, you can hardly bite each other to any purpose, unless by confent. Then as to the claws upon your feet before and hebind, they are fo fhort and tender, that one of ourjahoos would drive a dozen of yours before him. And therefore in recounting the numbers of thofe who have been killed in battle, I cannot but think you have faid The thing which is notis (bani ka 1. I could not forbear fhaking my head, and filing a little at his ignorance. And being noftranger to the art of war, Igaveshiva defcription of cannons, culverins, mufquets, carabines, pistols, bullets, powder; fwords, bayonets, bayonets, battles, fieges, retreats, attacks, undermines, countermines, bombardments, fea-fights, fhips funk with a thousand men, twenty thousand killed on each fide, dying groaus, limbs flying in the air, finoke, noife, confufion, trampling to death under hories feet; flight, pursuit, victory; fields ftrewed with carcafes, left for food to dogs and wolves, and birds of prey; plundering, ftripping, ravifhing, burning and destroying. And to fet forth the valour of my own dear countrymen, I affured him, that I had feen them blow up a bundred enemies at once in a fiege, and as many in a fhip; and beheld the dead bodies drop down in pieces from the clouds, to the great diverfion of the fpectators *. I was going on to more particulars, when my master commanded me filence. He faid, whoever understood the nature of yahoos, might eafily believe it poffible for fo vile an animal to be capable of every action I-bad named, it their strength and conning equalled their malice. as my difcourfe had increafed his abhorrence of the whole fpecies, fo he found it gave him a disturbance in his mind, But * It would perhaps be impoffible, by the most laboured argument or forcible eloquence, to fhew the abfurd injuftice and horrid cruelty of war fo effectually, as by this fimple exhibition of them in a new light. With war, including every species of iniquity and every art of destruction, we become familiar by degrees, under fpecious terms, which are seldom examined, becaufe they are learned at an age, in which the mind implicitly receives and retains whatever is imprest. Thus it happens, that when one man murders another to gratify his luft, we shudder; but when one man murders a million to gratify his vanity, we approve and we admire, we envy and we applaud, If, when this and the preceeding pages are read, we difcover with aftonishment, that, when the fame events have occurred in history, we felt no emotion, and acquiefced in wars which we could. not but know to have been commenced for fuch caufes, and carried on by fuch means; let not him be cenfured for too much debafing his fpecies, who has contributed to their felicity and prefervation, by ftripping off the veil of custom and prejudice, and holding up, in their native deformity, the vices by which they bes come wretched, and the arts by which they are destroyed. Hawke to which he was wholly a stranger before. He thought his ears, being used to fuch abominable words, might by degrees admit them with lefs deteftation. That although he hated the yahoos of this country, yet he no more blamed them for their odious qualities, than he did a gunayh (a bird of prey) for its cruelty, or a fharp ftone for cutting his hoof. But when a creature, pretending to reafon, could be capable of fuch enormiries, he dreaded, left the corruption of that faculty might be worfe than brutality itfelf. He feemed therefore confident, that, inftead of reafon, we were only poffeffed of fome quality fitted to increase our natural vices; as the reflection from a troubled stream returns the image of an illfhapen body, not only larger but more diflorted. He added, that he had heard too much upon the fub. ject of war, both in this, and fome former difcourfes. There was another point, which a little perplexed him at prefent. I had informed him, that fome of our crew left their country on account of being ruined by law; that I had already explained the meaning of the word; but he was at a lofs how it should come to pass, that the law, which was intended for every man's prefervation, fhould be any man's ruin. Therefore he defired to be farther fatisfied what I meant by law, and the difpenfers thereof, according to the prefent practice in my own country: because he thought nature and reason were fufficient guides for a reasonable animal, as we pretend to be, in fhewing us what we ought to do, and what to avoid. I affured his honour, that law was a science, in which I had not much converfed, further than by employing advocates in vain upon fome injuftices that had been done ine; however I would give hin all the fatisfaction I was able. I faid, there was a fociety of men among us bred up from their youth in the art of proving, by words multipli ed for the purpose, that white is black, and black is white, according as they are paid. To this fociety all the reft of the people are flaves. For example, if my neigh * As in every cause council are fee'd on both fides, it cannot be pretended, that this account is much exaggerated. Hawkef. bour |