DEFORMITIES DR SAMUEL JOHNSON. SELECTED FROM HIS WORKS Nihil rerum mortalium tam infiabile ac fluxum eft, quam fama- TACITUS. A Narrative which aims at Simplicity and which is ambitious to Dr STUART EDINBURGH; Printed for the AUTHOR; and fold by W. CREECH; and M.DCC.LXXXII. INTRODUCTION. WE "HEN a boy perufes a book with pleasure, his admi, ration rifeth immediately from the work to it's aúthor. His fancy fondly ranks his favourite with the wife, and the virtuous. He glows with a lover's impatience, to reach the prefence of this superior being, to drink of fcience at the fountain-head, to complete his ideas at once, and riot in the luxuries of learning. : The novice unhappily prefumes that men who command the paffions of others cannot be flaves to their own : That hiftorian must feel the worth of juftice and tenderness, while he tells us, how kings and conquerors are commonly the burden and the curfe of fociety: That an affertor of public freedom will never become the dupe of flattery, and the pimp of oppreffion : That the founder of a system cannot want. words to explain it That the compiler of a dictionary has at least a common degree of knowledge: That an inventor of new terms can tell what they mean: That he, who refines and fixes the language of empires, is able to converfe, without the pertness of a pedant, or the vulgarity of a porter: That a preacher of morality will blush to perfift in vindictive, deliberate, and detected falfehoods: That he who totters on the brink of eternity will speak with caution and humanity of the dead: And that a traveller, who pretends to veracity,dares not avow con tradictions. But in learning, as in life, much of our happiness flows from deception. Ignorance, the parent of wonder, is often the parent of esteem and love. While devouring Horace we venerate the Deferter of Brutus, and the Slave of Cæfar. Tranfported by his fublime eloquence, the reader of Cicero forgets that Cicero himself was a plagiarist and a coward : That Rome was but a den of robbers: That Cataline refembled the reft; and that this rebel was only revenging the blood of butchered nations; of Samnium, of Epirus, of Carthage, and of-HANNIBAL. • The ་ The laurels which human praise confers are withered and 'blafted by the unworthiness of those who wear them.' There is often a curious contraft between an author and his books. A theorift pens a volume to difplay the beauties of benevolence, though they never coft him a fbilling. A party-tool talks of public fpirit. A pedant commands our tears. A penfioner inveighs against penfions; and a bankrupt preaches public economy. The philofopher quotes Horace, while he defrauds his valet. A mimick of Richardson,is a domestic tyrant: A Sydenham, Pandora's box: A declaimer against envy, of all men the most invidious. The fatirift has not a reformer's virtues. The poet of love and friendfhip is without a mistress,or a friend; while a time-server celebrates the valour of heroes, and exults in the freedom of England. Like Pénelope, most writers employ part of their time, to undo the labours of the rest. Judging by their lives one would think it their chief study to render learning ridiculous. We lose all refpect for teachers, that, when the leffon is ended, are no wifer or better than common men.' To be convinced that books are trifles, let us only remark how little good they do, and how little those, who love them, love each other: The heroes of lettered fame, for the most part, regard a rival as an enemy. Their mutual hostilities, like those of aquatick animals, are unavoidable and conftant; and their voracity differs from that of the fark, but as a half-devoured carcafe, from a murdered reputation. The existence of very many books depends on the ruin of fome of the reft; yet, with our English Dictionary, a few immortal compofitions are to live unwounded by the fhafts of envy, and to defcend in a torrent of applaufe from one century to another. A thousand of their cri tics will daily be defpifed. A thousand of their imitators will fink into contempt; but they fhall defy the force of time; continue to flourish through every fashion of philofophy, and, like Egyptian pyramids, are to perish but in the ruins of the globe. ERRATA. P. 3. 1. 3. from the bottom, for slavery read obedience. P. 37. 1, 16. from the top, dele Bacon. In p. 61. the Asterisk refers to the Life of Smith. N the number of men who difhonour their own genius, may be ranked Dr Samuel Johnfon; for his abilities and learning are not accompanied by candour and gene. rofity. His life of Pomfret concludes with this maxim, that he who pleafes many, must have merit; yet, in defiance of his own rule, the Doctor has, a thousand times, attempted to prove, that they who please many, have no merit. His invidious and revengeful remark on Chefterfield, would haye difgraced any other man. He faid, and nobody but himself would have faid it, that Churchill was a fhallow fellow. And he once told fome of his admirers, that SWIFT was a fhallow, a very shallow fellow; reminding us of the Lilliputian that drew his bow to Gulliver. Swift, by a very fingular felicity, excelled both in verse and profe. He boasted, that no new word was to be found in his writings; though, in glory above all authors of his time, he did not fancy that entitled him to ingrofs or infult converfation. He was no lefs remarkably clean, than fome are remarkably dirty. His love of fame never led him into the lowest of all vices; and a fenfe of his own dignity made him refpe& the importance and the feelings of others. He often went many miles on foot, that he might be able to bestow what a coach would have coft him. He relieved fome hundreds of families from beggary, by lending them five pounds a-piece only. He infpired his footmen with Celtic attach❤ ment. Whatever was his pride, he fhewed none of it in the venerable prefence of mifery.' His intrepid eloquence first pointed out to his oppreffed countrymen, that path to independence, which their pofterity, at this moment, fo happily purfue. • His meanest talent was his wit,' His learning had no pedantry; his piety no fuperftition; his benevolence almost no parallel. For the memory of this man, who may be classed with Cato and Phocion, the Doctor feels no tenderness or respect. A And |