you, even to a mortal arbitrement ;* but nothing of the circumstance more. Vio. I beseech you, what manner of man is he? Fab. Nothing of that wonderful promise, to read him by his form, as you are like to find him in the proof of his valour. He is, indeed, Sir, the most skilful, bloody, and fatal oppositet that you could possibly have found in part of Illyria: Will you walk towards him? I will make your peace with him, if I can. any Vio. I shall be much bound to you for't: I am one, that would rather go with sir priest, than sir knight: I care not who knows so much of my mettle. [Exeunt. Re-enter Sir TOBY, with Sir ANDREW. Sir To. Why, man, he's a very devil; I have not seen such a virago. I had a pass with him, rapier, scabbard, and all, and he gives me the stuck-in, with such a mortal motion, that it is inevitable; and on the answer, he pays you as surely as your feet hit the ground they step on: They say, he has been fencer to the Sophy. Sir And. Pox on't, I'll not meddle with him. Sir To. Ay, but he will not now be pacified: Fabian can scarce hold him yonder. Sir And. Plague on't; an I thought he had been valiant, and so cunning in fence, I'd have seen hir damned ere I'd have challenged him. Let him let the matter slip, and I'll give him my horse, grey Capilet. Sir To. I'll make the motion: Stand here, make a good show on't; this shall end without the perdition of souls: Marry, I'll ride your horse as well as I ride you. [Aside. Re-enter FABIAN and VIOLA. Fab. O good Sir Toby, hold; here come the officers. Sir To. I'll be with you anon. [TO ANTONIO. Vio. Pray, Sir, put up your sword, if you please. [To Sir ANDREW. Sir And. Marry, will I, Sir;-and, for that I promised you, I'll be as good as my word: He will bear you easily, and reins well. 1 Off. This is the man; do thy office. 2 Of. Antonio, I arrest thee at the suit Of count Orsino. Ant. You do mistake me, Sir. well, 1 Off. No, Sir, no jot; I know your favour [head.Though now you have no sea-cap on your Take him away; he knows, I know him well. Ant. I must obey.-This comes with seeking me Much more, for what I cannot do for you, 2 Off. Come, Sir, away. Ant. I must entreat of you some of that money. For the fair kindness you have show'd me here, I'll make division of my present with you : quar-Hold, there is half my coffer. I have his horse [TO FAB.] to take up the Sir To. There's no remedy, Sir; he will fight with you for his oath sake: marry, he hath better bethought him of his quarrel, and he finds that now scarce to be worth talking of: therefore draw, for the supportance of his vow; he protests, he will not hurt you. Vio. Pray God defend me! A little thing would make me tell them how much I lack of [Aside. a man. Fub. Give ground, if you see him furious. Sir To. Come, Sir Andrew, there's no remedy; the gentleman will, for his honour's sake, have one bout with you: he cannot by the duello¶ avoid it: but he has promised me, as he is a gentleman and a soldier, he will not hurt you. Come on; to't. Sir And. Pray God, he keep his oath! Enter ANTONIO. [Draws. Ant. Will you deny me now? Vio. I know of none; Nor know I you by voice, or any feature: Ant. O heavens themselves! Ant. Let me speak a little. This youth that I snatch'd one half out of the jaws of death; mise Most venerable worth, did I devotion. 1 Off. What's that to us? The time goes by; away. Ant. But, O, how vile an idol proves this god!-[shame.Thou hast, Sebastian, done good feature In nature there's no blemish but the mind; None can be call'd deform'd, but ti. unkind: Virtue is beauty; but the beauteous-evil Are empty trunks, o'erflourish'd by the devil. 1 Of. The man grows mad; away with him. Come, come, Sir. Ant. Lead me on. SCENE II] THE TWELFTH NIGHT; OR, WHAT YOU WILL. Prove true, imagination, O, prove true, Vio. He nam'd Sebastian; I my brother know Sir To. A very dishonest paltry boy, and [Exit. more a coward than a hare: his dishonesty appears, in leaving his friend here in necessity, and denying him; and for his cowardship, ask Fabian. Fab. A coward, a most devout coward, religious in it. Sir And. 'Slid, I'll after him again, and beat him. Sir To. Do, cuff him soundly, but never draw thy sword. [Exit. Sir And. An I do not,Fab. Come, let's see the event. Sir To. I dare lay any money, 'twill be nothing yet. [Exeunt. ACT IV. SCENE I.-The Street before OLIVIA'S House. Clo. Will you make me believe, that I am not sent for you? Seb. Go to, go to, thou art a foolish fellow; Let me be clear of thee. Clo. Well held out, i'faith! No, I do not know you; nor I am not sent to you by my lady, to bid you come speak with her; nor your name is not master Cesario; nor this is not my nose neither.-Nothing, that is so, is so. Seb. I pr'ythee, ventt thy folly somewhere Thou know'st not me. Clo. Vent my folly! He has heard that word [else; of some great man, and now applies it to a fool. Vent my folly! I am afraid this great lubber, the world, will prove a cockney.-I pr'ythee now, ungird thy strangeness, and tell me what I shall vent to my lady; Shall I vent to her, that thou art coming? Seb. I pr'ythee, foolish Greek, depart from me; There's money for thee; if you tarry longer, Clo. By my troth, thou hast an open hand: These wise men, that give fools money, get themselves a good report after fourteen years' purchase. Enter Sir ANDREW, Sir TOBY, and FABIAN. Are all the people mad? [ Beating Sir ANDREW. o'er the house. Clo. This will I tell my lady straight; I would not be in some of your coats for two-pence. Sir To. Come on, Sir; hold. [Exit CLOWN. Sir And. Nay, let him alone, I'll go another [Holding SEBASTIAN. way to work with him; I'll have an action of battery against him, if there be any law in Il * In the reflection of my own figure. + Let out. 49 lyria: though I struck him first, yet it's no matter for that. Seb. Let go thy hand. Sir To. Come, Sir, I will not let you go. you are well fleshed; come on. Come, my young soldier, put up your iron: Seb. I will be free from thee. What would'st thou now? If thou dar'st tempt me further, draw thy sword. [Draws. Sir To. What, what? Nay, then I must have you. an ounce or two of this malapert blood from [Draws. Enter OLIVIA. Oli. Hold, Toby; on thy life, I charge thee, hold. Sir To. Madam? Fit for the mountains, and the barbarous caves, Be not offended, dear Cesario:- Do not deny: Beshrew his soul for me, ; Or I am mad, or else this is a dream :- [Exeun SCENE II-A Room in OLIVIA'S House. Enter MARIA and CLOWN. this beard; make him believe, thou art Sir Mar. Nay, I pr'ythee, put on this gown, and Topas the curate; do it quickly: I'll call Sir Toby the whilst. Clo. Well, I'll put it on, and I will dissem[Exit MARIA. ble|| myself in't; and I would I were the first that ever dissembled in such a gown. I am nor lean enough to be thought a good student: not fat enough to become the function well; but to be said, an honest man and a good housekeeper, goes as fairly, as to say, a careful and a great scholar. The competitors¶ man, enter. Enter Sir TOBY BELCH and MARIA. Clo. Bonos dies, Sir Toby: for as the old Sir To. To him, Sir Topas. Clo. What, hoa, I say,-Peace in this prison! 50 Mal. Sir Topas, Sir Topas, good Sir Topas, | me in darkness, send ministers to me, asses, and do all they can to face me out of my go to my lady. wits. Clo. Out, hyperbolical fiend! how vexest thou this man? talkest thou nothing but of ladies? Sir To. Well said, master parson. Mal. Sir Topas, never was man thus wronged: good Sir Topas, do not think I am mad; they have laid me here in hideous darkness. Clo. Fie, thou dishonest Sathan! I call thee by the most modest terms; for I am one of those gentle ones, that will use the devil himself with courtesy: Say'st thou, that house is dark? Mal. As hell, Sir Topas. Clo. Why, it hath bay-windows* transparent as barricadoes, and the clear stones towards the south-north are as lustrous as ebony; and yet complainest thou of obstruction? Mal. I am not mad, Sir Topas; I say to you, this house is dark. Clo. Madman, thou errest: I say, there is Bo darkness, but ignorance; in which thou art more puzzled, than the Egyptians in their fog. Mal. I say, this house is as dark as ignorance, though ignorance were as dark as hell; and I say, there was never man thus abused: I am no more mad than you are; make the trial of it in any constant question.† Clo. What is the opinion of Pythagoras, concerning wild-fowl? Mal. That the soul of our grandam might haply inhabit a bird. Clo. What thinkest thou of his opinion? Mal. I think nobly of the soul, and no way approve his opinion. Clo. Fare thee well: Remain thou still in darkness: thou shalt hold the opinion of Pythagoras, ere I will allow of thy wits; and fear to kill a woodcock, lest thou dispossess the soul of thy grandam. Fare thee well. Mal. Sir Topas, Sir Topas, Sir To. My most exquisite Sir Topas! Mar. Thou might'st have done this without thy beard, and gown; he sees thee not. Sir To. To him in thine own voice, and bring me word how thou findest him: I would, we were well rid of this knavery. If he may be conveniently delivered, I would he were; for I am now so far in offence with my niece, that I cannot pursue with any safety this sport to the upshot. Come by and by to my chainber. [Exeunt Sir TOBY and MARIA. Clo. Hey Robin, jolly Robin, Tell me how thy lady does. [Singing. Mal. Fool, Clo. My lady is unkind, perdy. Clo. Alas, why is she so? Mal. Fool, I say ;-- Clo. She loves another-Who calls, ha? Mal. Good fool, as ever thou wilt deserve well at my hand, help me to a candle, and pen; ink, and paper; as I am a gentleman, I will live to be thankful to thee for't. Clo. Master Malvolio! Clo. Alas, Sir, how fell you besides your five wits? Mal. Fool, there was never man so notoriously abused: I am as well in my wits, fool, as thou art. Clo. But as well? then you are mad, indeed, Bow windows. Clo. Advise you what you say; the minister is here.-Malvolio, Malvolio, thy wits the heavens restore! endeavour thyself to sleep, and leave thy vain bibble babble. Mal. Sir Topas, Clo. Maintain no words with him, good fellow.-Who, I, Sir? not I, Sir. God b'wi'you, good Sir Topas.-Marry, amen.-I will, Sir, I will. Mal. Fool, fool, fool, I say,-. Clo. Alas, Sir, be patient. What say you, Sir? I am shent* for speaking to you. Mal. Good fool, help me to some light, and some paper; I tell thee, I am as well in my Sir! wits, as any man in Illyria. Clo. Well-a-day,—that you were, Mal. By this hand, I am: Good fool, some ink, paper, and light, and convey what I will set down to my lady; it shall advantage thee more than ever the bearing of letter did. Clo. I will help you to't. But tell me true, are you not mad indeed? or do you but counterfeit? Mal. Believe me, I am not; I tell thee true. Clo. Nay, I'll ne'er believe a madman, till I see his brains. I will fetch you light, and paper, and ink. Mal. Fool, I'll requite it in the highest degree: I pr'ythee, begone. I am gone, Sir, Clo. And anon, Sir, Like to the old vice,t Adieu, goodman drivel. SCENE III-OLIVIA'S Garden. Enter SEBASTIAN. [Exit. Seb. This is the air; that is the glorious sun; sense, That this may be some error, but no madness, [me [ing, Take, and give back, affairs, and their despatch, With such a smooth, discreet, and stable bearAs, I perceive, she does: there's something in't. That is deceivable. But here comes the lady. Enter OLIVIA and a PRIEST. Oli. Blame not this haste of mine: If you mean well, Now go with me, and with this holy man, Fab. Any thing. Clo. Do not desire to see this letter. Fab. That is, to give a dog, and, in 1ecompense, desire my dog again. Enter DUKE, VIOLA, und Attendants. Duke. Belong you to the lady Olivia, friends? Clo. Ay, Sir; we are some of her trappings. Duke. I know thee well; How dost thou, my good fellow? Clo. Truly, Sir, the better for my foes, and the worse for my friends. Duke. Just the contrary; the better for thy friends. Clo. No, Sir, the worse. Clo. Marry, Sir, they praise me, and make an ass of me; now my foes tell me plainly I am an ass so that by my foes, Sir, I profit in the knowledge of myself; and by my friends I am abused: so that, conclusions to be as kisses, if your four negatives make your two affirmatives, why, then the worse for my friends, and the better for my foes. Duke. Why, this is excellent. Clo. By my troth, Sir, no; though it please you to be one of my friends. Duke. Thou shalt not be the worse for me; there's gold. Clo. But that it would be double-dealing, Sir, I would you could make it another. Duke. O, you give me ill counsel. Clo. Put your grace in your pocket, Sir, for this once, and let your flesh and blood obey it. Duke. Well, I will be so much a sinner to be a double-dealer; there's another. Clo. Primo, secundo, tertio, is a good play; and the old saying is, the third pays for all: the triplex, Sir, is a good tripping measure; or the bells of St. Bennet, Sir, may put you in mind; One, two, three. Duke. You can fool no more money out of. me at this throw: if you will let your lady know, I am here to speak with her, and bring her along with you, it may awake my bounty further. Clo. Marry, Sir, lullaby to your bounty, till + Until • Little chapel. I come again. I go, Sir; but I would not have you to think, that my desire of having is the sin of covetousness: but, as you say, Sir, let your bounty take a nap, I will awake it anon. [Exit CLOWN. Enter ANTONIO and OFFICERS. Vio. Here comes the man, Sir, that did rescue me. Duke. That face of his I do remember well; Yet, when I saw it last, it was besmear'd As black as Vulcan, in the smoke of war: A bawbling vessel was he captain of, For shallow draught, and bulk, unprizable; With which such scathful grapple did he make With the most noble bottom of our fleet, That very envy, and the tongue of loss, Cried fame and honour on him.-What's the matter? 1 Off. Orsino, this is that Antonio, That took the Phoenix, and her fraught,† from And this is he, that did the Tiger board, Candy; When your young nephew Titus lost his leg: Here in the streets, desperate of shame, and state, In private brabble did we apprehend him. Vio. He did me kindness, Sir; drew on my side; But, in conclusion, put strange speech upon me, I know not what 'twas, but distraction. Duke. Notable pirate! thou salt-water thief! What foolish boldness brought thee to their mercies, Whom thou, in terms so bloody, and so dear, Hast made thine enemies? Ant. Orsino, noble Sir, Be pleas'd that I shake off these names you give me ; Antonio never yet was thief, or pirate, Which I had recommended to his use Vio. How can this be? Duke. When came he to this town? Ant. To-day, my lord; and for three months before, (No interim, not a minute's vacancy,) Both day and night did we keep company. Enter OLIVIA and Attendants. Duke. Here comes the countess: now heaven walks on earth. But for thee, fellow, fellow, thy words are madness: Three months this youth hath tended upon me; But more of that anon.- Take him aside. Oli. What would my lord, but that he may not have, Wherein Olivia may seem serviceable?- Duke. Gracious Olivia, Oli. What do you say, Cesario?--Good my lord, Vio. My lord would speak, my duty hushes me. Oli. If it be aught to the old tune, my lord, It is as fat and fulsome to mine ear, As howling after music. Duke. Still so cruel? Oli. Still so constant, lord. Duke. What! to perverseness? you uncivil lady, To whose ingrate and unauspicious altars My soul the faithfull'st offerings hath breath'd out, That e'er devotion tender'd! What shall I do? Oli. Even what it please my lord, that shall become him. Duke. Why should I not, had I the heart to do it, Like to the Egyptian thief, at point of death, Live you, the marble-breasted tyrant, still; mischief: I'll sacrifice the lamb that I do love, Oli. Where goes Cesario? Oli. Ah me, detested! how am I beguil'd! Vio. Who does beguile you? who does do you wrong? Oli. Hast thou forgot thyself! Is it so long!-Call forth the holy father. [Exit an Attendant. Duke. Come away. [TO VIOLA. Oli. Whither my lord?-Cesario, husband, stay. Duke. Husband? Oli. Ay, husband; Can he that deny ? Vio. No, my lord, not I. Oli. Alas, it is the baseness of thy fear, That makes thee strangle thy propriety :+ Fear not, Cesario, take thy fortunes up; Be that thou know'st thou art, and then thou art [father! As great as that thou fear'st.-O, welcome, Re-enter Attendant and PRIest. Father, I charge thee, by thy reverence, Here to unfold (though lately we intended To keep in darkness, what occasion now Reveals before 'tis ripe,) what thou dost know, Hath newly past between this youth and me. + Disown thy property. • Dull, grows. Priest. A contract of eternal bond of love, Confirm'd by mutual joinder of your hands, Attested by the holy close of lips, Strengthen'd by interchangement of your rings; And all the ceremony of this compact Seal'd in my function, by my testimony: Since when, my watch hath told me, toward my grave, I have travell'd but two hours. Duke. O, thou dissembling cub! what wilt thou be, When time hath sow'd a grizzle on thy case?* [fear. Hold little faith, though thou hast too much Enter Sir ANDREW AGUE-CHEEK, with his head broke. Sir And. For the love of God, a surgeon; send one presently to Sir Toby. Oli. What's the matter? Sir And. He has broke my head across, and has given Sir Toby a bloody coxcomb too: for forty pounds, I were at home. the love of God, your help: I had rather than Oli. Who has done this, Sir Andrew? Sir And. The count's gentleman, one Cesario: we took him for a coward, but he's the very devil incardinate. Duke. My gentleman, Cesario! broke my head for nothing; and that that I Sir And. Od's lifelings here he is :-You did, I was set on to do't by Sir Toby. Vio. Why do you speak to me? I never hurt You: You drew your sword upon me, without cause; But I bespake you fair, and hurt you not. Sir And. If a bloody coxcomb be a hurt, you have hurt me; I think, you set nothing by a bloody coxcomb. Enter Sir TOBY BELCH, drunk, led by the CLOWN. Here comes Sir Toby halting, you shall hear more but if he had not been in drink, he would have tickled you othergatest than he did. you? Duke. How now, gentleman? how is't with Sir To. That's all one; he has hurt me, and there's the end on't.-Sot, did'st see Dick surgeon, sot? Clo. O he's drunk, Sir Toby, an hour agone'; his eyes were set at eight i'the morning. Sir To. Then he's a rogue. After a passymeasure, or a pavin, I hate a drunken rogue. Oli. Away with him: Who hath made this havoc with them? Sir And. I'll help you, Sir Toby, because we'll be dress'd together. Sir To. Will you help an ass-head, and a coxcomb, and a knave? a thin-faced knave, a gull? to. Oli. Get him to bed, and let his hurt be look'd [Exeunt CLOWN, Sir TOBY, and Sir ANDREW.] Enter SEBASTIAN. Seb. I am sorry, madam, I have hurt your kinsman; |