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Honour. The children of Don Towlero and Don Howlero, two brave Canine Captains, who fell in attempting to quell the mutiny, I truft you will recommend to the Firft Conful to fill places in the Prytaneum, or one of the primary fchools. I have ordered the body of Don Towlero to be flayed, and the skin to be ftuffed and fent home for the Mufeum Napoleon.

"Hereto is fubjoined a lift of killed, wounded, and miffing, of the Canine fubfidiaries,

"Killed-1 Lieutenant, 2 Sergeant, 9 Rank and

File.

"Wounded-3 Lieutenants in the ears and toes -17 Rank and File flightly. "Miffing-9 ears, 18 tails.

"I have the honour to falute you.

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[Here follow the Proclamation and General Orders of the Commander in Chief of the Canine Subfidiaries to his troops upon their landing in St. Domingo ; an armistice entered into between him and the black General Chriftophe upon the 8th Germinal, year 11 § and several official letters and dispatches.]

TO THE PUBLIC.

The above official articles were fent in a packet to our office, and they appeared evidently of French manufacture. A note accompanied them in a difguifed hand. We therefore do not know who fent it; but we have no doubt, as it was marked in tar upon the back," a fhip letter," that it came from a French port, and was brought over by fome neutral veffel, and thence communicated through the medium of the Poft-office. We pledge ourselves that the original is in the hands of the printer.

RECIPE

RECIPE HOW TO BADGER A MINISTER.

IF he form alliances, or fend out expeditions, you may talk of our blood and treafure being loofely, wantonly, and prodigally wafted, while poor Old England is left naked and defencelefs. If, on the contrary, when the danger is at our doors, he calmly and firmly waits in a defenfive attitude, ufing every means to concentrate the national force, and to direct it as occafion requires to the neceffary point, then you must change your battery, and abufe him for not fending out expeditions to diftrefs the enemy by depriving him of pepper to his foup, and of coffee for his afternoon repaft.-Probatum eft.

PARODY ON A WELL-KNOWN ENGLISH SONG.

AD SODALEM. NOBILISSIMUM

PRÆSAGEM, AB
EXCURSIONE NAVALI REVERTENTEM.

WEL

ELCOME, welcome, brother Croaker!
To this debt-demolish'd ifle!

Where no fcoffer, wag, or joker,

Now dares fhew his fneering fmile:
Where, 'twixt tax and muskets resting,
Muzzled Fear locks up her foul;
Much too ill at eafe for jefting-
Much too well dragoon'd to growl.

Sons of Freedom's fond adoption,
Britons, long fo bleft and brave!
All you've left feems now the option
'Twixt a bankrupt and a flave!
Hope, her choice of evils viewing,
Doubts which firft may ftop her breath:
There the foe lies, big with ruin-
Here the budget, big with death.
Bitter dofe of Billy's brewing-
Billy-bane of Britain's days!-
In a few fad years undoing
All that ages toil'd to raise.
F4

Like

Like a wolf, let loofe on plenty,

He her vitals drain'd fo faft,

Now, good folks, nineteen in twenty
Feel Britannia heaves her last.

Roufe! oh, roufe then, brother Croaker!
To defpair let 's fcorn to bend ;
While we curfe the hand that broke her,
We'll Britannia's wreck defend !
Though the 's fhatter'd, crufh'd, and finking,
Bravely yet the tops the tide;

And her bottom's, to my thinking,

Fairly worth the world befide.

Now an honeft pilot steers her,

Free from tyrant pride and hate;
Now a nation's voice too cheers her
Through this ftruggling storm of Fate;
Then, though fhort our comfort's measure,
Since we yet fome crumbs may find,
Curs'd by Pt's wide wafte of treasure,
Well we 'll guard what's left behind.
All that's dear at ftake to move us;
All that charms and fooths our lives;
All we love, and all that love us-
Children, parents, friends, and wives;
King and country, laws and altars,
Claim the pious hands of all;
And may fhame brand him who falters,
When the gods of battle call!

As we drink, then, brother Croaker,
So we'll fight Old England's bout;
Hand to hand, though Hell provoke her,
Like our flask, we'll fee it out.

At the field, as at the table,

Jointly bent to finish all;

We'll ftand to 't like men, while able,
Or, like men, together fall.

Fill! oh, fill then, brother Croaker—
In my toast all virtues live;
Call Britannia! loud invoke her!
While her own great fons I give ;-

Here's

Here's our King! the beft in ftory-
Here's the Prince! our country's pride-
Here's brave York! the foldier's glory-
And all Brunswick's line befide.

ODE FOR THE NEW YEAR, 1804.

BY H. J. PYE, ESQ. P. L.

WHEN, at the defpot's dread command,
Bridg'd Hellefpont his myriads bore

From fervile Afia's peopled ftrand
To Græcia's and to Freedom's fhore-
While hoftile fleets terrific sweep,
With threatening oar, th' Ionian deep,
Clear Dirce's bending reeds among
The Theban fwan no longer fung *:
No more by Ifthmus' wave-worn glade,
Or Nemea's rocks, or Delphi's shade,
Or Pifa's olive-rooted grove,
The temple of Olympian Jove,
The Mufes twin'd the facred bough,
To crown th' athletic victor's brow,
Till on the rough gean main,
Till on Platea's trophied plain,

Was crufh'd the Perfiau tyrant's boast,
O'erwhelm'd his fleet, o'erthrown his hoft;
Then the bold Theban feiz'd again the lyre,
And ftruck the chords with renovated fire:
"On human life's delufive ftate,

Though woes unseen, uncertain, wait,
Heal'd in the gen'rous breaft is every pain,

With undiminish'd force, if Freedom's rights remain †.”
Not fo the British Mufe-though rude
Her voice to Græcia's tuneful choir,
by dread, by danger unfubdu'd,
Dauntlefs the wakes the lyric wire.

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So when the awful thunder roars,
When round the livid lightnings play,
Th' imperial eagle proudly foars,
And wings aloft her daring way.
And, hark! with animating note
Aloud her strains exulting float,
While pointing to th' invet'rate host,

Who threat deftruction to this envied coaft :-
"Go forth, my fons--as nobler rights ye claim,
Than ever fann'd the Grecian patriot's flame;
So let your breasts a fiercer ardour feel,

Led by your patriot King to guard your country's weal."
Her voice is heard-from wood, from vale, from down,
The thatch-roof'd village and the busy town,
Eager th' indignant country fwarms,

And pours a people clad in arms,
Numerous as thofe whom Xerxes led,
To crush devoted Freedom's head;

Firm as the band for Freedom's cause who stood,
And ftain'd Thermopyla with Spartan blood;
Hear, o'er their heads, th' exulting Goddefs fing
"Thefe are my favourite fons, and mine their warrior King!"
Through Albion's plains while wide and far
Swells the tumultuous din of war,
While from the loon, the forge, the flail,
From Labour's plough, from Commerce' fail,
All ranks to martial impulse yield,

And grafp the fpear, and brave the field,
Do weeds our plains uncultur'd hide?
Does drooping Commerce quit the tide ?

Do languid Art and Industry
Their useful cares no longer ply?

Never did Agriculture's toil

With richer harvests clothe the foil

Ne'er were our barks more amply fraught,

Ne'er were with happier fkill our ores, our fleeces wrought.

While the proud foe, to fwell invasion's host,

His bleeding country's countlefs millions drains, And Gallia mourns through her embattled coaft, Unpeopled cities and unlabour'd plains,

To

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