Absence of Mind.

THIS is that habit which some people have, of thinking of one thing, while they are doing another. The famous Sir Isaac Newton was a philosopher, and he thought a great deal about the heavenly bodies, and such mighty matters. Of course, he could hardly be expected to think much about common things. However, he did once have a fancy for a lady, and one evening he went to see her. As he was sitting with her by the fireside smoking his pipe, he became absorbed in his mathematics, and in his absence of mind he took hold of the lady's finger and stuck it into the fiery bowl of his pipe, thus making it a tobacco-stopper!

I once knew an old lady who would go about the room, looking upon the shelf, peeping into the table drawer, tumbling over a cupboard that served as a kind of Noah's ark, where every strange thing was deposited-all the time teasing and fretting because she could not find her spectacles, until at last she discovered that the said spectacles were snugly sitting astride of her nose!

But this is a trifling instance of absence of mind, compared with some others. An old maid of Edinburgh, in Scotland, had taken an unaccountable fancy to a pig, which she kept as a kind of pet about the house, and often took it into her lap. The poor thing seemed to be forever pinched with a pain in its bowels, and therefore kept up an almost perpetual squealing. Still, the kind woman loved it all the better, and cherished it the more for its very infirmities. The lady was withal a literary lady, and fond of reading and writing books, and her head ran upon these operations so much, that she often forgot where she was, and what she was doing.

One day, she appeared at the door of a neighbor in a good deal of trouble,

with the pig under her arm, squealing with all its might, as usual; upon which the following dialogue ensued:

Woman. Good morning, neighbor! Good morning! I called to see you about-about-something or other-but in fact I forget what it was I was after.

Neighbor. Oh! you wanted something or other, and you thought you'd come and ask me what 'twas you wanted?

Woman. Why yes-no. Be still, you naughty pig! be still! Yes, I am looking for something. Stop your everlasting squealing! Oh! I remember! I've lost my pig. Have you seen anything of him?

Neighbor. Why, what's that you have under your arm?

Woman. Gracious! I've got the pig under my arm all this time! Poor, dear thing that I should have forgotten you, while I was all the time thinking of you! and that I should have lost you while I was clasping you to my breast! Well done! I must be a genius, as aunt Dorcas says!

Some years ago there lived at the city of Washington a famous Englishman by the name of Thomas Law. He was very absent-minded, and often forgot his christian name. One day, he was writing a letter, and when he came to the end, and wanted to sign his name, he was in great trouble because he could not remember the first part of it. At last, Claxton, the door-keeper, chanced to be passing, and Law remembered that his christian name was the same as Claxton's. Accordingly he said, "Claxton, what is your christian name?" "Thomas," was the answer. "Oh yes, Thomas," said Law, and immediately wrote his name, "Thomas Law!"

These instances are somewhat amusing, but I can tell you of an instance in which absence of mind proved more serious. A famous courtier once wished

to ingratiate himself into the favor of two persons of great rank and power, but who were deadly enemies to each other. These were Lord B. and Lord Q. In order to please these two persons, the courtier wrote a letter to each of them. That of Lord B. was as follows:

My dear Lord B.

I met with Lord Q. last evening at Lady Lackaday's. It was the first time I had seen him. I felt instinctively an aversion similar to that which is inspired by the presence of a serpent. I can easily enter into your feelings respecting him. Indeed, I do not see how any one can differ from your lordship in this matter. It is impossible not to feel a sympathy with the man who stands in open and manly opposition to one upon whose forehead "knave" is written by

the hand of his Creator.

I am, dear Lord, yours,

B. L.

HUMOR.-A number of years ago, an eccentric old gentleman, residing in a cottage in England, was greatly annoyed by noctural depredators, who broke the fences in his garden, in order to get at the good things contained therein. As he did not care so much for the loss of the fruit as the damage done to the enclosures, and as he was rather fond of witticisms, he had the following notice put up: "All thieves are in future to enter by the gate, which will be left open for the purpose."

HAS A DOG WINGS?" Father, has a dog got wings?"

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No, my son."

"Well, I thought so-but mother told me, the other day, that as she was going along the road, a dog flew at her."

IRISH WIT.-An honest Hibernian, upon reading his physician's bill, replied, that he had no objections to pay him for his medicines, but his visits he would return.

Death of the President.

WILLIAM HENRY HARRISON, who became President of the United States on the 4th of March last, died on the night of the 4th of April, just thirty days after he had entered upon the duties of his high office.

This event is calculated to cast a gloom over the whole nation, for Gen. Harrison was generally esteemed a good man, and most persons believed that he would govern the country in a manner to promote the happiness of the people. He had lived to be almost seventy years of age; and now, being elevated to the highest

office in the gift of the people, he is suddenly cut down, and laid in the same dust that must cover ordinary men. This dispensation of Providence seems almost like quenching a great beacon-light upon the sea-shore at night, just at the moment when its illumination had begun to scatter the darkness around.

A solemn thought is suggested by this event. Gen. Harrison has lived a long life, and has often been in the midst of seeming peril. He has often been in battle with savages and with the British soldiery. He has often trodden the forest amid all the dangers and vicissitudes that beset the traveller there. He has spent many days of toil in the field, laboring as a farmer. In all these situations and conditions -from youth to age-he has enjoyed the pro

tecting care of Providence. But at last he was elevated to a great office; he became the occupant of a palace; he was the hope of a great nation; he was surrounded with friends, with mighty men, with skilful physicians, with tender nurses-with the great, the good, the prayerful-but all in vain. His time had come-the arrow was sped from the bow, and no human arm could stay its flight. And this should warn us all to consider well the lesson conveyed by this event-which is, that life and death are in the hands of God. He can protect us everywhere-in the cottage or the logcabin, in the forest or the field; or he can take us away in the midst of power and pomp and riches. Let us therefore be ever prepared for the decisions of his wisdom.

CHAPTER VII.

My uncle's influence.-The influence of the tavern.-State of society forty years ago-Liquor opposed to education. The church and the tavern. The country schoolhouse.-Books used in the school. A few words about myself.

I PASS over a space of several years in my history, and come to the period when I was about fifteen. Up to this time, I had made little progress in education, compared with what is done at the present day. I could indeed read and write, and I knew something of arithmetic, but my advance beyond this was inconsiderable. A brief detail of certain circumstances will show the reason of this.

In the first place, my uncle had no very high estimation of what he called Zarnin; he was himself a man of action, and believed that books render people dull and stupid, rather than effi

cient in the business of life. He was therefore opposed to education in general, and particularly so in my case; and not only was his opinion equivalent to law with respect to me, but it was of great force in the village, on account of his character and position.

He kept the village tavern, which in those days of rum and punch was an institution of great power and authority. It was common, at the period of which I speak, for the church or meeting-house and tavern to stand side by side; but if one day in the week, sobriety and temperance were preached in the former, hard drinking and licentiousness were deeply practised in the latter during the other six. The tavern, therefore, not only counteracted the good effect of the preacher, but it went farther, and in many cases corrupted the whole mass of society. The members of the church

thought it no scandal to make regular visits to the bar-room at eleven o'clock in the forenoon, and at four P. M.; the deacon always kept his jugs well filled, and the minister took his toddy or his tansy bitters, in open day, and without reproach.

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In such a state of society as this, the tavern-keeper was usually the most influential man in the village, and if he kept good liquors, he was irresistible. Now my uncle was a prince of a tavernkeeper for these jolly days. He was, in fact, what we call a whole-souled fellow generous, honest, and frank-hearted. His full, ruddy countenance bespoke all this; and his cheerful, hearty voice carried conviction of it to every listener. Beside, his tavern was freely and generously kept it was liberally supplied with good beds, and every other luxury or comfort common to those days. As I have said before, it was situated upon the great road, then travelled by the mail stages between Boston and New York. The establishment was of ample extent, consisting of a pile of wooden buildings of various and irregular architecture-all painted a deep red. There was near it a large barn with extensive cow-houses, a corncrib, a smoke-house, and a pig-sty, arranged solely with a view to ease of communication with the house, and consequently all drawn closely around it. The general effect, when viewed at a distance, was that of two large jugs sur rounded with several smaller ones.

Before this heap of edifices swung the tavern sign, with a picture of a barn-yard cock on one side, and a bull upon the other, as I have told you before: and though the artist that painted it was only a common house-dauber, and though the pictures were of humble pretensions when compared with the productions of Raphael, still, few specimens of the fine arts have ever had more

admirers than the cock and bull of my uncle's sign. How many a toper has looked upon it when approaching the tavern with his feverish lip, as the emblem and assurance of the rum that was soon to feed the fire kindled in his throat; how many a jolly fellow, staggering from the inn, has seen that sign reeling against the sky, and mixing grotesquely with the dreamy images of his fancy!.

If we add to this description, that in the street, and nearly in front of the tavern, was a wood-pile about ten feet high, and covering three or four square rods of ground; that on one side was a litter of harrows, carts and ploughs, and on the other a general assortment of wagons, old sleighs, broken stages, and a rickety vehicle resembling a modern chaise without a top; and if we sprinkle between all these articles a good supply of geese and pigs, we shall have a pretty fair account of the famous Cock and Bull tavern that flourished in Salem nearly forty years ago.

The proprietor of such an establishment could not, in those days, but be a man of influence; and the free manners and habits of my uncle tended to increase the power that his position gave him. He drank liberally himself, and vindicated his practice by saying that good liquor was one of the gifts of providence, and it was no sin-indeed it was rather a duty-to indulge in providential gifts freely. All this made him a favorite, particularly with a set of hard drinkers who thronged the bar-room, especially of a wet day and on winter evenings.

As I have said, my uncle was opposed to education, and as he grew older and drank deeper, his prejudice against it seemed to increase; and though I cannot easily account for the fact, still every drunkard in the place was an enemy to all improvements in the school. When a town-meeting took place, these per