Eve endure and groan under their Exile, and cannot but lament the Bitterness of this imperfect gloomy Day, which Men on Earth call Evil. A Day but short, and, which is worse, difmal and uncomfortable. For, who can worthily exprefs the Pains, the Perplexities of Body and Soul, which are the neceffary, the infeparable Incumbrances of Man's prefent Condition? A Condition, wherein he is polluted with fo many Sins, entangled in fo many Difficulties, befet with fo many Misfortunes, opprefs'd with fo many Fears, diftracted with fo many Cares, difturbed and diverted from his main Concern by fo many Impertinences, deluded with fo many Vanities, confounded with fo many Errors, wafted and worn out with fo much Labour and Trouble; affaulted by Temptations, emafculated by Pleafures, and tormented with great variety of Neceffities and Wants?

O! when will there be an end of this fo complicated Misery? When may I hope to be enlarged and releafed from this Bondage of Sin? When fhall my Thoughts and Defires center, and be for ever fixed, in Thee, my God, alone? When may I hope to attain true Joy in Thee, without any allay of bodily Suffering, without any Distraction of Mind? When fhall I reft in firm untroubled Peace? Peace from Accidents and Temptations without, Peace from Guilt and Mifguiding, from the Solicitations of Luft, and the Violence of Paffion within? When fhall I fee my Jefus Face to Face, and contemplate the Beauties of his Kingdom and Glorious Godhead? When will my deareft Saviour be my All in All, and receive me to those blissful Habitations prepared for them that love him, and that are loved by him, before the Foundation of the World?

Behold! I am here defolate and poor, a Stranger and alone in an Enemy's Country; where Wars rage and never ceafe, and terrible Diftreffes come thick

and

and strong upon me every Day and Hour. Be thou my Comfort in this exiled and defolate Condition. Affwage my Pain, and incline thy Favour to thy SerPfal. cxliii. vant, whose parched and languishing Soul gafpeth unto thee as a thirsty Land. Thou only art able to do this; For, what the mistaken World calls Comforts, are but fo many fresh Additions to my Burden. I long most earnestly to enjoy, but cannot yet attain my Wish. Fain would I grafp and cling to heavenly things, but am detained and faftened down to Earth, by Vanities below, and unmorti fy'd Affections. My Mind labours to get above these ; but even, when the Spirit is willing, I find the Flefh extremely weak, and my fenfual, prevails over mý better and heavenly Inclinations.

Thus am I, wretched Man, involved in a perpetual War, and live in Contradiction to my felf; my own Hindrance and Torment, moving different ways, and pursuing different Ends and Profpects, at one and the fame time. How great is my Concern and Conflict, when I fet my Mind to Meditate and Pray, and, in the midst of this Exercife, am interrupted by a Clutter of worldly and carnal Imaginations crowding in upon me? Go not far from me, O my God, neither caft away thy Servant in Difpleafure. Scatter thefe dark and gloomy Clouds, which intercept my Vision of thee, by the Brightness of thy Lightning; Thunder upon them from Heaven, caft out thine Arrows Pfal. cxliv. and difcomfit them. Recollect my Broken and Scattered Thoughts, help me to forget the things of this World, to reject and defpife, and effectually drive away all finful Imaginations. Affift me, thou fubftantial Truth, and root me faft, that no Blaft of Vanity may shake and unfettle my Heart. Diffuse thy Heavenly Sweetnefs through my Soul, and chafe away all naufeous, unfavoury, and impure Affections, for thefe cannot ftand before thee.

Pare

Particularly, deareft Lord, I implore thy Compaffion upon my Infirmities; and in thy Mercy impute not to me my many wandring Thoughts in Prayer. For there, I muft confefs, my Diftractions are great and frequent; and I am often least of all in that place, where I ftand or kneel: Thus, while my Body is before thy Footstool, my Mind is carried away I know not whither. And this is a very melancholy Refle ction, fuch as gives me occafion to fufpect, and deeply bewail my felf. Since where my Thoughts are, there properly and indeed am I; and where my Thoughts frequent, and delight to dwell, there without doubt is the Object of my Affection and Concern; and that, which either natural Difpofition or long Cuftom renders most delightful, that to be fure is moft familiar, and comes continually uppermoft. All this I gather from that Obfervation, which thou, Eternal Truth, haft left us, that where our Treasure is, there will our Heart be alfo.

Matth. vi.

This then is the Rule, by which I try and found the Bent of my Heart; If I love Heaven, the Thoughts of it will be frequent and pleafant to me. But if I love the World, the Effect of this will be, that I shall feel Excefs of Joy in profperous Events, and be as immoderate in my Grief for thofe that are otherwife. If I love the Flefh, wanton and carnal Imaginations will often return upon me, and be entertained with Satisfaction; but if I love the Spirit, then shall I find in Spiritual Objects a grateful Relish, and dwell upon them with true Delight. For this my own Senfes and Experience affure me, that what I love moft, I am best pleased to be entertained with, greedieft to hear and forwardeft to talk of, moft careful to remember, and to preferve deep and lafting Impreffions of upon my Mind. And therefore, though I cannot attain to it fo fully as I wifh and ftrive, yet I can plainly perceive, and do truly value and admire, the Happiness

of

of Them, who can abandon all, and ftick to Thee alone; that commit a holy Violence upon their natural Inclinations, Crucify the Flesh, and with a pure bright Zeal, and a clear Confcience, can offer holy, fervent Prayers, a fpiritual and unblemish'd Sacrifice: Where All without are forbidden entrance, and All within is compofed. Thefe Men, fo firmly intent upon Thee and their Devotions, are fit to praife thee with thofe Angels, whofe refined Excellencies they fo happily afpire after, and to whofe bleffed Society thou wilt one Day exalt and admit them.

CHA P. LIV.

Of the Defire of Eternal Life, and the Happiness of Them who ftrive Manfully.

Chrift.]

MY

Y Son, when thou feeleft thy Soul inflamed with an eager Defire of Eternal Happiness, and thinkeft long to be released from this Prison of the Body, that thou may'st be bleffed with a nearer and more distinct View, a perfect, full and uninterrupted Fruition, of my Brightnefs and Majefty; fet open all the Avenues of thy Soul, and greedily receive the holy Inspiration. Exprefs thy humblest Thanks to God, and be duly fenfible of his Goodness, who deals fo bountifully with thee, vifits thee with his Mercy, fupports and ftrengthens thee with his Grace, and raifes thofe Affections up to Heaven, which have a fatal innate Tendency to immerse thy Soul in Earth, and Flesh, and Senfe. For, do not mistake the Matter, no Reasonings or Endeavours of thy own have power to effect fo good a Work, or to create thofe Spiritual Inclinations; the Finger of God is in them, and they are owing to no

lefs

lefs noble a Caufe, than the free and bountiful Donation of Divine Grace and Favour: The Defign of which is to advance and exalt thy Virtues; to make thee humble and modeft, with Reflections upon the Strength of another made perfect in thy Weakness; to fit thee for future Tryals, and forer Conflicts; to engage thy Affections, and encourage thy Perfeverance, in the faithful Service of fo gracious, fo good a Master.

Nor let thy Spirits be dejected, Son, if this be not W done with all that Zeal, and entire Resignation of a Heart perfectly undivided, which thou could'ft wish. For, as in common Fire there will always be fome Smoke; fo in thefe holy Flames many Men are fincerely defirous of heavenly Things, who yet cannot quite diveft themselves of Carnal Affections, nor be abfolutely free from all Temptations. And therefore fome other Prospects will often interpofe, as well as that of promoting God's Glory only, by thofe good Actions, for which the Affiftances of his Grace are fought, and earneftly implored. Of this thy own Experience convinces thee by fundry Inftances, in which thou feeft no Reafon to fufpect thy own Integrity. Nor will all that be condemned at the laft Day, which was attempted with á Mixture of fome Defire to promote thy own Advantage. Only take care that this Defire prevail not fo far, as to incline thee to prefer what may contribute to thy Profit or Delight, before those Things which will procure my Favour and Accep tance, and be for mine and for Religion's Honour. For with a wife confiderate Chriftian, my Will takes place above his own Defires, or any the most inviting Object; and if it reign not in his Heart alone, yet it always fits Supreme, and over-rules the reft. I know all thy Defires, and thy Groanings are not hid Pfal.xxxviiia from me. Thou would'ft this Inftant be admitted into the glorious Liberty of the Sons of God; the blissful and eternal, Manfions of thy heavenly