ページの画像
PDF
ePub

pleafeft. For this I know, that how grievous foever thefe Temporal Croffes may be, yet better is it to feel the Weight of thy Hand here, than hereafter. All Things are naked and open to thee, even the inmoft Receffes of our Hearts; Thou knoweft the Things that will be before they are; and needest not that any fhould inform thee what is done upon Earth. Thou feeft what will contribute moft to my Improvement in Goodness; how great and good Effect Diftreffes have, to fcour the Ruft from our unactive Minds, and brighten all our Virtues. Take then, my God, thy own Measures; I only beg, that thou would'ft not difdain, and give me over, and think me unworthy thy Care, for thofe Blemishes and Mifdemeanors of my Life, which none are better acquainted with, which none indeed are thoroughly acquainted with, but Thou the Searcher of Hearts alone.

Work in me, I intreat thee, a true Amendment: In-. struct me in all things fit for me to know; Difpofe me to love all Things worthy my Affection; to think, that every Thing deferves my Praife, in proportion as it pleases thee; to esteem nothing highly, but what is precious and honourable in thy fight; to look with a generous Difdain upon all that thou thinkest vile, and never be reconciled to what thou hateft. Let me not, I beseech thee, judge by outward Appearances, the feeing of the Eye, or the hearing of the Ear, whichare fubject to infinite Delufions and Miftakes. But. give me a right Judgment in all Things, whether they relate to this or another State, to the outward, or the inner Man: And, above all, let it be my fpecial Care to inform my felf in thy Will concerning me. Men, who form their Judgment upon Senfe, often err; Men, who fet their Affections upon the fenfible Objects of this World, are frequently difappointed and miferable: For, is a Man, for inftance, one whit the better, because he is grown greater in other Men's Efteem?

R 4

Efteem? Is common Opinion the Standard of Merit ? Nothing lefs. Here every Man abuses his Fellow; The Cheat impofes upon another as great a Cheat; the Vain puffs up the Vain; the Blind misleads the Blind the Weak fupports the Weak; and all the while, by empty undeferved Commendations, each brings a true Reproach upon the other, while he extols him against Senfe and Reafon. For after all, thefe Praises are but Words without any Significance; nothing more than Air and empty Sound; for every Man is juft fo much, fo good, and neither more nor lefs, than he is in thy Efteem only. I

CHA P. LVI,

A Man must be content with meaner Acts of Virtue, when he is indifpofed for greater.

Cbrift.] D can always be equally bright, or ton

O not fuppofe, my Son, that thy Zeal

thy Mind capable of Tranfport and intent Contemplation upon heavenly Objects at all Time. Thou carrieft about with thee a Load of Infirmity and Corruption, which will often/damp the cleareft Flames of Devo tion, darken thy Mind, and check its noble Flights and make thee know and feel, that Mortal Flefh and Blood is a heavy, but infeparable, Incumbrance upon a Rational and Religious Soul. While Men are in the Body, there is no Remedy, but they muft feel and groan under the Weight. And groan they ought indeed, when they confider, how great an Interruption this is to their Attendance upon, and entire Dedication of their Time and Thoughts, to God and Heavenly Objects. These they must be content to dwell upon as much as may be, by fnatching all thofe happy

Intervals, which Leifure and a good Temper of Mind

allow them.

But when the Soul is indifpofed for Nobler Exercifes, when Cares or Infirmities prefs it down, let it not be unactive, Variety is here of ufe; and Works of a meaner Rank in the Scale of Virtue must be recurred to; that thou may'ft be ftill employ'd, ftill waiting for the happy Hour, when I fhall return and vifit thee with larger Meafures of my Grace. Bear with Meeknefs the prefent Difcomfort and Incapacity, the dry and barren State of my Soul, till I fend my refreshing Dews, and infufe a Principle of Fruitfulness, for a Product in greater Plenty and Perfection. For I can foon make thee to forget thy paft Troubles, and fatisfy thy Mind with the Abundance of Peace, I open for thee the fpacious Plains of Scripture, that thou may'ft be enlarged, and run the way of my Commandments in Liberty; and, with a Soul full of Joy and inward Exultation, fay, I reckon that

Rom. viii.

the Sufferings of this prefent time are not worthy to be compared with the Glory which shall be repealed in us.

CHA P. LVII.

A Man fhould think Correction, not Comfort,

Difciple.]

bis due,

Ord, I muft needs with Shame confefs felf altogether unworthy thy Comforts, or any part of that Care thou art pleased to take of my Soul and therefore I have no pretence to complain of hard Ufage, or Injuftice, when thou withdraweft thy Grace, and leaveft me to my felf. Whole Seas of Tears could not fo cleanfe my polluted Soul,

[ocr errors]

as to render it pure enough to merit the bleffed Influences of thy Spirit. Scourges and Vengeance are the Portion of a Wretch, who by fo many and fo grievous Tranfgreffions hath offended thy Majefty. The more therefore I reflect upon my own Sinfulness, the clearer and jufter Notions I have of thy free undeferved Mercy. For Merciful thou art, even to Aftonishment, whofe Bowels thus yearn over the Work of thy own Hands; who thus to all the World haft manifested the Riches of thy Grace in the Veffels of Mercy, and extendeft thy Liberality to thofe who have no Right to challenge, no Recommendation to induce thee to it.

[ocr errors]

But, if we could pretend to Comforts, yet how could we expect fuch divine, fuch incomparably fweet and noble Marks of thy Favour? So very unlike, fo much above any Human Helps or Encouragements? For how could I expect the Bread of Life from Heaven? Good Works I know of none I have to plead ; but the flightest Recollection even amazes and confounds me with Sins innumerable brought to my Remembrance. My vehement Proneness to Evil, and fhameful Sloth and Backwardnefs to Reformation and Goodness, are of themselves fo evident, that should r labour to cloak them, the Attempt muft needs be vain; For thou, the Searcher of Hearts, art privy to them; Thou canft difprove me, and no Advocate is to be found, who could offer any thing in my Vindication. What then can I juftlý lay claim to, but Hell and everlasting Flames? I own with Grief and Shame, that Reproach and Contempt are my due; and that I am unworthy to be named among thy Sons, or even thy meaneft Servants. Nature indeed starts back, and cannot without Reluctancy acknowledge its own Vilenefs and Guilt; but I will offer Violence to my Native Pride, and freely confefs my Sins, that thou may'ft fhew thy Juftice and Faithful

nefs,

ness, in a full and free Pardon of the Faults I do freely confefs.

But where fhall I find Words fit for fo miferable a Condition, or how fhall fo fcandalous a Creature ape ply to thee for Pardon? I know no other Terms than thefe, that can become my Mouth. "Lord, I have "finned, I have done wickedly. Mercy, thou Judge

of Quick and Dead, Mercy, or I perish. Refpite "thy Sentence yet a little while, and grant me fome "time at leaft to bewail my Mifery, before I be "fwallowed up in Darkness, and go into a

1

"Land, Black with the Terrors of the Sha- Job x. "dow of Death. What other Reparation doft thou "expect, what other can indeed be had, from Men "laden with Guilt and Infirmity, than that they "fhould ferioufly bewail, and humble themselves for "their mighty and manifold Provocations? Hence "all our Hopes of Remiffion fpring, here the first

Seeds of a Reconciliation take root; the Joy of a "peaceful Confcience is fown in Tears; the Ac "knowledgment of our Weakness is the first Step to wards repairing our Lofs, the firft Defence againft the Wrath to come; and in thefe melancholy Solitudes the Gracious God and penitent Soul meet "and embrace each other. A broken and a

contrite Heart is reputed a Sacrifice; and Pfal. li.

Thou, in marvellous Condefcenfion preferreft it "before the Odours, the fweeteft Incenfe, or whole "Hecatombs of Burnt-Offerings. Of this that pre"cious Ointment, whofe Perfumes, when it anointed "thy holy Feet, filled the whole Houfe, was an Em-. "blem; for Thou, Lord, never didft or wilt, de"fpife a Soul afflicted with a Senfe of Sin. Contri❝tion and Humility are our Sanctuary against the "Rage and Malice of our Spiritual Adverfary; and "Tears of Penitence are that purifying Stream, "which wafhes off the Stains and Blemishes of our defiled Souls. CHAP.

« 前へ次へ »