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Erter Hort, Caius, and Rugby. Shah It appears so, by his weapons': keep them affunder: here comes Doctor Caius.
Page. Nay, good Mr. Parson, keep in your weapon.
Hoft. Disarm them, and let them question ; let them keep their limbs whole, and hack our English Ceius. I pray you, let-a me speak a word with
your car: wherefore will you not meet-a me?
Eva. Pray you, vse your patience in good time.
Caius. By gar, you are de coward, de Jack dog, Fokn ape.
Eva. Pray you, let us not be laughing-stocks to other men humours : I desire you in friendship, and will one way or other make you amends ; I will knog your urinal about your knave's cogs-comb, for' mifling your meetings and appointments.
Caius. Diable! Jack Rugby, mine Hof de Jartere, have I not stay for him, to kill him: have I not, at de place I did appoint ? Eva. As I am a christian's foul, now look
this is the place appointed; I'll be judgment by mine Hoft of the Garter.
Hoft. Peace, I say, Gallia and Gaul, French and Welch, foul-curer and body-curer.
Caius. Ay, dat is very good, excellent.
Hoft. Peace, I say; hear mine Hoft of the Garter, Am i politick ? am I subtle? am I a Machiavel? fhall I lose my Doctor ? no; he gives me the potions and the motions, Shall I lose my Parson? my
Sir Hugh ? no; he gives me the proverbs and the no-verbs. Give ine thy hand, terreftial; fo: Give me thy hand, celestial; fo. Boys of art, I have deceiv'd you both : I have directed you to wrong places : your hearts are mighty, your skins are whole, and let burn'd fack be the issue. Come, lay their swords to pawn. Follow me, lad of peace, follow, follow, follow.
Sbal. Trust me, a mad Hoft. Follow, gentlemen, follow.
Slen. O, sweet Anne Page!
[Exeunt Shal. Slen. Page and Host. Caius. Ha ! do I perceive dat? have you
make a de fot of us, ha, ha?
Eva. This is well, he has made us his vloutingstog. I desire you, that we may be friends ; and let us knog our prains together to be revenge on this fame scald-fcurvy-cogging companion, the Host of the Garter.
Caius. By gar, with all my heart ; he promise to bring me where is Anne Page ; by gar, he deceive me
Eva. Well, I will smite his noddles; pray you follow.
SCENE, The Street, in Windsor,
Enter Mistress Page, and Robin.
Mrs. Paze. N
were wont to be a follower, but now you are a leader. Whether had you rather lead mine eyes, or eye your master's heels ?
Rob. I had rather, forsooth, go before you like a man, than follow him like a dwarf.
Mrs. Page. O, you are a flattering boy; now, you'll be a Courtier.
Mrs. Page. Truly, Sir, to see your wife ; is the at home?
Ford. Ay; and as idle as she may hang together, for want of company; I think, if your husbands were dead, you two would marry.
Mrs. Page. Be sure of that, two other husbands.
pretty weather-cock: Mrs. Page. I cannot tell what the dickens his name. is my husband had him of: what do you call your Knight's name, firrah ?
Rob. Sir John Falstaff:
Mrs.. Page. He, he ; I can never hit on's name; there is such a league between my good man and he.
Is your wife at home, indeed?
Ford. Indeed, she is.
Mrs, Page. By your leave, Sir; I am fick, 'till I fee her.
[Exeunt Mrs. Page and Robin. Ford. Has Page any brains ? nath he any eyes ? hath he any thinking sure, they sleep ; he hath no use of them. Why, this boy will carry a letter twenty miles, as easy as a cannon will shoot point-blank twelve-score ; he pieces out his wife's inclination; he gives her folly motion and advantage ; and now she's going to my wife, and Falstaff?s boy with her. A man may hear this shower fing in the wind: and Falstaff's boy with her! good plots; they are laid, and our revolted wives share damnation together. Well, I will take him, then torture my wife : pluck the borrow'd veil of modesty from the so feeming mistress Page, divulge Page himself for a secure and wilful Afteor, and to these violent proceedings all my neighbours shall cry aim. The clock gives me my cue, and my assurance bids me fearch ; there I fall find Falstaff: I shall be rather praised for this, than mocked ; for it is as positive as the earth is firm, that Falfaj is there : I will go.
To him, Enter Page, Shallow, Şlender, Hoft, Evans,
Shal. Page, &c. Well met, Mr. Ford.
Ford. Trust me, a good knot : I have good cheer at home, and, I pray you,
all Shal. I must excuse myself, Mr. Ford: Slen. And so must l, Sir'; we have appointed to dine. with Mrs. Anne, and I would not break with her for more money than I'll speak of.
Shal. We have linger'd about a match between Anne. Page and my cousin Slender, and this day we shall have our answer,
1 Slen. I hope, I have your good will, father Page.
Page. You have, Mr. Slender; I stand wholly for you; but my wife, maiter Doctor is for you, altogether.
Caius. Ay, by gar, and de maid is love-a-me ; my nurth-a-Quickly tell me so mulh.
Hift. What say you to young Mr. Fenton ? he capers, he dances, he has eyes of youth, he writes verses, he speaks holy day, he smells April and May; he will carry't, he will carry't ; 'tis in his buttons, he will carry't.
Page. Not by my consent, I promise you : the Gentleman is of no Having, he kept company with the wild Prince and Poinz : he is of too high a region, he knows too much ; no, he shall not knit a knot in his fortunes with the finger of my substance. If he take her, let him take her fimply : the wealth I have waits on my consent,
way. Ford. I beseech you, heartily, some of you go home with me to dinner ; besides your cheer you shall have sport; I will fhew you a monster. Mr. Doctor, you shall go; so fhall you, Mr. Page; and you,
Sir Hugh. Shal. Well, fare you well, we shall have the freer wooing at Mr. Page's.
Caius. Go home, John Rugby, I come anon.
Hoft, Farewel, my hearts ; I will to my honest Knight Falstaff, and drink Canary with him.
Ford. I think, I shall drink in Pipe-wine first with him: I'll make him dance. Will you go, gentles ?
All. Have with you, to see this moniter. [Exeunt.
SCENE changes to Ford's House.
Enter Mrs. Ford, Mrs. Page, and Servants with a basket. Mrs. Ford. HAT, John! what, Robert !
Mrs. Page. Quickly, quickly: is the buck-basket Mrs. Ford. I warrant. What, Robin," I faya Mrs. Page. Come, come, come. Mrs. Ford. Here, set it down.
Mrs. Page. Give your men the charge, we must be brief.
Mrs. Ford. Marry, as I told you before, John and Robur, be ready here hard by in the brew-house, and when I suddenly call on you, come forth, and without any Jaufe or ftaggering take this baket on your shoulders ; That done, trodge with it in all hafte, and carry it amongthe whititers in Datchet-Mead, and there empty it in the muddy ditch close by the Thames fide. • Mrs. Page. You will do it?
Mrs. Ford. I ha' told them over and over ; they lack no direction. Be gone, and come when you are calld. Mrs. Paze. Here comes litle Robin.
Enter Robin. Mrs. Ford. How now, my Eyas-mosket, what news with you
Rob. My master Sir John is come in at your backdoor, mistress Ford, and requests your company:
Mrs. Page. You little Jack-a-lent, have you been true to us?
Rob. Ay, I'll be sworn ; my matter knows not of : your being here, and hath threaten'd to put me into everlasting liberty, if I tell you of it ; for he fwears, he'll turn me away.
Mrs. Page. Thou'rt a good boy ; this secrecy of thine shall be a taylor to thee, and shall make thee a new doublet and hose. I'll go hide me.
Mrs Ford. Do ro; go tell thy master, I am alone ; mistress Page, remember you your cue,
[Exit Robin. Mrs. Page. I warrant thee ; If I do not act it, hiss
Exit Mrs. Page. Mrs. Ford, Go to then ; we'll use this unwhólfomé humidity, this gross watry pumpion we'll teach him to know turtles from jays.
Enter Falstaff. Fal. Have I caught thee, my heav'nly jewel ? why, now let me die; for I have lived long enough ; this is the period of my ambition; O this blefied hour!