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" When a man marries, if he acts wisely, he marries for love; he prefers the person before property, and virtue before beauty; the mind before the body. Such a man seeks in a wife, one that may prove a friend and a companion, a second self, one that will equally share with him in all his pleasures, and in all his troubles; one that will measure her satisfaction, safety, and danger, entirely by his; that gives up all the world for him, and gives herself to him, to be po longer her own, but his. He expects to find every thing in her that is implied in a help-meet; he expects her to love him, and cherish him, not in health and affluence only; but in sickness, in poverty, and disgrace, if such should be his lot. He expects that their interests, and their , affections, will be so entwined, and united, that nothing but death can possibly separate them,
And while he expects all this from her, when he takes her to his bosom, he intends that she shall find all this in him. She is his best beloved, he loves her above all others, it is his great pleasure to be loved by her, and the more entirely he possesses her whole heart and soul, the more delight and joy he feels
in the union that subsists between them.
True friendship is in the mind :: sexes make no difference, since in souls there is none; and they are the subjects of friendship. He that in marriage regards the body and not the mind, has not the better part of that relation; and will consequently want the noblest comfort of a married life. A sincere, mutual, and disinterested regard, is the only basis of conjugal felicity; and when this is wanting, no human ties can insure that tenderness and, affection which marriage was intended to sanction.' · The author of Telemachus gives the following description of the marriage state in Betica. The honour of the men in this Country depends as much upon their fidelity to their wives, as the honour of women in others on their fidelity to their husbands. Never were people so virtuous, nor so careful of their chastity. The women are beautiful and engaging; but plain, modest, and laborious. Their marriages are peaceful, * faithful, and unspotted. The husband and the wife seem to have but one soul in two different bodies, and they, divide all their domestic cares between them.
The husband manages all affairs abroad, and the wife confines herself to those of the house. She comforts her husband, slie seems born only to please him ; she wins his confidence; she charms him less by her beauty, than by her virtue; and, the pleasure they take in each other's company lasts as long as they live.
This, my dear Sir, is as it should be. There is nothing unnatural here. This is not the language of romance; but of nature. What can be more reasonable, than for the husband and the wife to make it their study to promote each other's happiness?
The husband and wife must be like the primitive christians, of one heart, and of one soul, and each must endeavour in all things to please the other, that they may live in love and peace. Without this, instead of being a blessing to each other, there is much reasou to fear that they will prove mutual tormentors, and render each other miserable.
The principal consideration then seems to be, how married people ought to conduct themselves, so as to maintain unity of spirit; that the happiness they proposed to themselves, and promised
to each other, in the season of courtship, may be completely realized in wedlock.
You, my dear Sir, are well aware that the best rules of duty are to be found in that best of all good books the Bible. And you will agree with me, that a strict and constant attention to the directions contained in that most excellent book, will certainly conduct us to the enjoyment of happiness. · Let us hear then an inspired penman : . Wives submit yourselves unto your own husbands as unto the Lord : For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the Church: and he is the Saviour of the body. Therefore as the Church is subject unto Christ; so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
• Husbands love your wives, even as Christ also loved the Church, and gave himself for it.
So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.'
You perceive, my dear Sir, that the duties here enjoined are of the greatest importance.
I shall take the liberty to subjoin a few remarks, to encourage you and your beloved to pay all possible attention to these divine instructions. For it can never be too deeply impressed upon your minds, that the best of all possible means to promote and increase true satisfaction and happiness between yourselves, is, to give earnest heed unto the revealed will of God, concerning the duties of your respective relations.
The apostle begins by giving instructions unto the wife. Not that the hus'band is not equally bound to endeavour
to maintain the spirit of the marriage covenant: nor yet because it depends more upon the wife than the husband to maintain it: but because the husband is the head of the wife. The man was not made for the woman, but the woman for the man: and both for the Lord.' Let not your dear partner be displeased at being reminded in an affectionate and friendly manner, (especially as the occasion requires it that she owes submission and reverence to her husband, as well as affection. This was particularly enjoined by the Almighty himself. Because the woman was first in the transgression, therefore it was said ; “ Her desire shall be to her husband, and he shall rule over her."