"feaft on Thurfday; Colonel Plum fays he in"tends to have the honour of waiting on us." "Brother," replied Mifs Umphraville, you "know we don't deal in giving feasts; but, if "Colonel Plum can dine on a plain dinner, "without his foreign difhes and French fauI can promife him a bit of good mut"ton, and hearty welcome."

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On the day appointed, Colonel Plum arrived, and, along with him, the gay, the fprightly Sir Bobby Button, who had posted down to the country to enjoy two day's fhooting at Colonel Plum's, where he arrived juft as that gentleman was fetting out for Mr Umphraville's. Sir Bobby, always eafy, and who, in every fociety, is the fame, protefted against the Colonel's putting off his vifit, and declared he would be happy to attend him.

Though I had but little knowledge of Sir Bobby, I was perfectly acquainted with his character; but to Umphraville he was altogether unknown, and I promised myself fome amufement from the contraft of two perfons so oppofite in fentiments, in manner, and in opinions. When he was prefented, I observed Umphraville fomewhat fhocked with his drefs and figure; in both which, it must be VOL. II. B b owned,

owned, he resembled a monkey of a larger fize. Sir Bobby, however, did not allow him much time to contemplate his external appearance; for he immediately, without any preparation or apology, began to attack the old gentleman, on the bad taste of his houfe, and of every thing about it. "Why the de

"vil," faid he, "don't you enlarge your win"dows, and cut down thofe damned hedges. " and trees that spoil your lawn fo miferably? "If you would allow me, I would undertake, "in a week's time, to give you a clever place. "This is, for all the world, juft fuch a cha"teau as my friend Lord

"Lord

(you know the fineft fellow on earth) "fucceeded to last year, by the death of an "uncle, a queer old prig, who had lived lock❝ed up in his castle for half a century : "died damned rich though; and as foon as "Lord knew for certain that his breath

-he

was out, he and I went down to take poffef"fion; and in a ftrange condition, to be fure, "we found things; but, in lefs than a month,

we turned all topsy-turvy, and it is now in "the way of being as fine a place as any in

cr

England "To this Umphraville made no anfwer; and indeed the Baronet was fo fond

of

of hearing himself talk, and chattered away at fuch a rate, that he neither feemed to defire nor to expect an answer.

On Mifs Umphraville's coming in, he addreffed himself to her; and, after difplaying his drefs, and explaining fome particulars with regard to it, he began to entertain her with an account of the gallantries in which he had been engaged the preceding winter in London. He talked as if no woman could refift his perfuafive addrefs, and elegant figure — as if London were one great feraglio, and he himfelf the mighty mafter of it.This topic he was fo fond of, that he enlarged upon it after Mijs Umphraville had retired, and used a grossiereté of expreffion in his defcriptions, which, of late, has been very much affected by our fine gentlemen, but which shocked Umphraville, to whom it was altogether new, and who has ever entertained the highest veneration for the fex.

To put an end to this converfation, Colonel Plum, who feemed to be tired of it, as we were, mentioned the very fingular fituation this country was in, when the combined fleets of France and Spain lay off Plymouth, and took occafion to obferve, that, if our fleet. fhould

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fhould be vanquished, if our wooden walls fhould fail us, he was afraid our country, thus laid open to the invasion of thofe hoftile powers, could not eafily refift their force. Umphraville entertained a very different opinion. He faid, that a naval force might perhaps be neceffary to maintain and defend an extenfive foreign commerce; but he did not fee how it was at all connected with the internal defence of a ftate, or why a nation might not be refpectable, both at home and abroad, without any great fleet? "Were the Englith," faid he, "indebted to their wooden "walls for the victory of Crefy, of Poitiers, "and of Agincourt? Was it by a naval force "that the great Gustavus was enabled to take "fo decifive a part in the affairs of Europe, "and to render the power of Sweden fo re

fpectable? Is it by fhips that the brave

Swifs have defended their liberties for fo many ages? What fleets did our own "country poffefs, while fhe boldly maintained "her independence, for fo many centuries,

against the conftant and unremitted attacks "of England? Did we poffefs a single ship "of force when the gallant Bruce almost an"nihilated the power of England on the field

❝ of

"of Bannockburn? Believe me, gentlemen," continued he, "it is not an eafy matter to "fubdue a free people fighting for their coun

try. In fuch a caufe, every man would "ftand forth. Old as I am, I would not he"fitate a moment to draw my sword against "our foes, thould they ever be defperate e

nough to make an attempt on these islands." -"You may, if you pleafe," faid Sir Bobby, (who feemed to be awed for a time into filence, by the elevated tone Umphraville had. affumed), "but I'll be curfed if I would. "Damn it, what does it fignify? If the French

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were to conquer us, I don't think we could ❝lofe much by it; and, in fome respects, we "fhould gain. We fhould drink better Bur¢ gundy; and we should have cloaths fit for a "< gentleman to wear, without running the "risk of their being feized by thefe damned. "locufts of custom-houfe officers. I fhould "not like, though, to lofe my feat in the "Houfe. If the French leave us that, they

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may come again when they please for me." -Umphraville, who had not the moft diftant conception of his being in parliament, asked. Sir Bobby gravely, what feat, what houfe he meant? "Why, damn it, our Houfe, the "House

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